Some people think that the government should give financial support to artists such as musicians, painters and poets. Others think that it is a waste of money. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Creating uniqueness is an art towards which certain
people
Use synonyms
involved
Add a missing verb
are involved
such
as painters, poets and musicians. A section of society holds a belief that these artists should be allocated Linking Words
by
some amount for their desirable work by Change preposition
apply
the
law enforcement agencies; Correct article usage
apply
however
, some think that it is just a squandering of money as there are other various things to be paid for.Linking Words
This
essay intends to discuss both Linking Words
the
viewpoints followed by my opinion in the forthcoming paragraphs with suitable illustrations.
The most conspicuous reason Correct article usage
apply
as to
why strata of society advocate that the government should provide some Change preposition
apply
fundings
for the artists is that they present their talents and entertain the whole world with their ideas of presentation of certain things which sometimes are unimaginable by the common community. Raftar, for Fix the agreement mistake
funding
an
instance, is an eminent rapper who brought a new field of music into the country which was not known before. Correct article usage
apply
Moreover
, freshers in these streams need initial financial support so that they may give their best performance without any burden of being paid by them or their families.
Linking Words
On the contrary
, others have conflicting views regarding the usage of official money towards necessities Linking Words
instead
of donating to entertain the crowd. Linking Words
In other words
, the entire country is facing issues in Linking Words
regards
to education and health services which is way more important than contributing an inordinate amount of money to the art section. To illustrate, these days the whole world is under threat Fix the agreement mistake
regard
due to
Linking Words
covid
pandemic and Correct your spelling
the
need
a substantial amount of Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
fundings
Fix the agreement mistake
funding
in
Change preposition
for
the
treatment which has skyrocketing expenses; Correct article usage
apply
consequently
, the higher authorities should spend on Linking Words
such
circumstances where the lives of a lot of Linking Words
people
are at Use synonyms
risks
. Another considerable reason is that the savings of the country need to be given to the Fix the agreement mistake
risk
people
who Use synonyms
belong
in poverty so that they may survive.
Verb problem
are
To conclude
, despite the fact that Linking Words
the
artists play an imperative role in entertaining Correct article usage
apply
the
folks and they should be allocated financial support by Correct article usage
apply
the
government officials, I Correct article usage
apply
Add a missing verb
am incline
incline
towards those who opine that there are other activities Replace the word
inclined
such
as disasters and maintaining the Linking Words
people
's basic amenities which cannot be overlooked.Use synonyms
Submitted by sakshivashist1994 on
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task achievement
Consider enhancing the depth of your arguments by elaborating more on each viewpoint, providing further examples or explanations.
task achievement
Avoid using highly informal language or phrases that may distract the reader, such as 'strata of society' or 'play an imperative role.'
coherence cohesion
Ensure smooth transitions between ideas or sentences to improve the overall flow of the essay.
coherence cohesion
The essay is well-organized, with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and conclusion, which effectively guide the reader through the discussion.
task achievement
You addressed both sides of the argument, contributing to a balanced discussion.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.