IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 4.5

Some people think that certain old buildings are more worth preserving than other ones. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #buildings #ones
There
are
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is
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 a subgroup of people that believe that some architectural constructions have more worth and that there would be merit in their preservation, compared to other structures that are equally as worn out. In
this
essay
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essay,
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 I will discuss why
this
 is an appropriate notion and reach a conclusion.
Firstly
, there are many building developments that have become outdated but still possess a great deal of economic worth.
For instance
, Buckingham Palace is a
world renowned
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world-renowned
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 structure that has been present in the UK for centuries, it has
succeed
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succeeded
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 in becoming a tourist attraction that gathers visitors from across the globe.
This
 means that
,
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apply
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 the preservation of
such
 a site is not only beneficial in terms of tourism but
also
 boosts the economy of the country greatly.
Secondly
, there are various built designs that are old in age but are enriched with culture and history.
For example
, Sandal
castle
Capitalize word
Castle
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 was built during the War of the Roses and the presence of
such
 a relic ensures that history lives on.
Moreover
, the preservation of
such
 sites ensures that a
societies
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society's
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 culture, history and values are learnt by future generations.
On the other hand
,
although
 there are many buildings that are not fit for purpose in
todays'
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today's
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 modern world, they still have a role to play in our society. To elaborate
further
, for the elder generation there may be various older designed structures that they may emotionally resonate with.
Additionally
, these sites may be of significant emotional value and a chance for them to interact with other members of their community, as the aged are notoriously lonely. In conclusion, it is advisable that historic buildings should be preserved as they have a direct part to play in the tourism and economy of a country.
Submitted by abeera2012 on

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task achievement
Ensure that you maintain a clear position throughout your essay, addressing the extent to which you agree or disagree with the statement. Your essay should reflect a consistent viewpoint and this needs to be made clear in both the introduction and the conclusion for better task achievement.
coherence cohesion
Organise your ideas logically, using paragraphs to separate main points. Make sure each paragraph starts with a clear topic sentence and that the following sentences develop that idea coherently.
coherence cohesion
Use a range of linking words and phrases to connect ideas and paragraphs, which will aid in the flow of your essay and make the structure more coherent. Avoid overusing certain connectives, strive for a variety.
task achievement
Incorporate specific, relevant examples to support your main points. While some examples were given, try to ensure they are fully developed and clearly linked to your argument to maximize the impact on the reader.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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