IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

companies should provide sports and social facilities for local communities. To what extent do you agree?

#companies #sports #facilities #communities
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is often argued that should
oganaization
Correct your spelling
organization
 issue games and social
resources
Use synonyms
 for
Use synonyms
home
Add an article
the home
show examples
 region? Most of the companies should do many free activities for their local people
such
Linking Words
 as welfare facilities and conducting the sports.
However
Linking Words
, I strongly agree with
this
Linking Words
 statement and I will be mentioning my points in the upcoming paragraphs. On the one hand, every company have the responsibility for
develop
Change the verb form
developing
show examples
 the society in order to they should provide these
amenties
Correct your spelling
amenities
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, when
a
Change the article
an
show examples
 industry conduct
the
Remove the article
apply
show examples
any games competition
with in
Correct your spelling
within
show examples
 their
home
Use synonyms
 region while they get more benefits both the industry and the people.
Secondly
Linking Words
, corporate social
responsibity
Correct your spelling
responsibility
 is the most important factor of every establishment
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
Linking Words
 they should do any kind of games competition in order to they should contribute to the country why they are being used all country
resources
Use synonyms
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
Linking Words
 they should provide physical activity.
For example
Linking Words
, in India
top most
Correct your spelling
topmost
show examples
 business people are
sponserd
Correct your spelling
sponsored
 IPL cricket match as well as they have
own
Correct pronoun usage
their own
show examples
 IPL team
such
Linking Words
 as Mumbai Indians team owner is Nita Ambani.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
this
Linking Words
 kind of firm should do to what social facilities
such
Linking Words
 as free medical camp, arrange the welfare
resources
Use synonyms
, road supply and help to the poor man, and so on.
Moreover
Linking Words
, these kinds of potential should give to the community folks because the firm is taken all
home
Use synonyms
 region
resources
Use synonyms
 compared to living man
such
Linking Words
 as water, land.
Therefore
Linking Words
, they have a responsibility to do
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
for particular area humans.
For example
Linking Words
, the top most communication enterprise JIO, they are organised every
tear free
Add a hyphen
tear-free
show examples
 medical camp for rural residents as a
reslt
Correct your spelling
result
, the rural residents have a chance to take
best
Change the article
the best
show examples
 medicine. To conclude, the enterprise has more capital compared to normal guy
Add the comma(s)
, therefore,
show examples
therefore
Linking Words
 they should contribute to the society improvements
this
Linking Words
 means they must spend money for
home
Use synonyms
 citizens.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, they should give all these
varities
Correct your spelling
varieties
 of
amenties
Correct your spelling
amenities
 irrefutably.
Submitted by reanudeepan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: