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Writing Samples
Band 5

Some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys ?

#parents #children #toys #child
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Some kids are loaded with toys by their
parents
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. Due to the lack of time to play with them, some
parents
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 buy
innumerous
Correct your spelling
in numerous
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 objects, trying to mitigate the insufficient attention. In
this
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 essay, I will outline the positive sides and drawbacks of
this
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 exaggerated gifting to children.
To begin
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 with, looking at the upsides of
this
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 trend, kids that notably have lots of toys waste most of their time playing.
For instance
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, one case in point would be exemplified by the movie ToyStory. In the movie, the main human character, Andy, has so many objects in his room that the number of playing he created alone were uncountable.
Moreover
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, in the case of
a
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an
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 only child, as Andy in the movie, receive a large number of toys to play
would
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with would
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 help infants to improve
Correct pronoun usage
their
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they
Correct your spelling
the
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 creativity, as in the majority, they do not have someone to play with, forcing them to use their imagination to have fun. In stark contrast, there are a
lot
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oflot
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 downsides consequent of
this
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 phenomenon. To illustrate
this
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, one study conducted by
psychology
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the psychology
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 department of the State University of Ceará has shown that
parents
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 who spend some time playing with their children, these minors are more likely to be happier and do not suffer from the lack of tutors attention. Taking the aforementioned example, the same study concluded that children
whom
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whose
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parents
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 are present and who receive gifts
in
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on
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 special occasions only
,
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apply
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 tends to grow without
parents
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 mental linked disorders. To summarize, giving presents to minors is not a setback, since their tutors are gifting them in order to make them feel special and not as a surrogate
attetion
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attention
.
Submitted by alexandretco on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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