Some parents buy their children a large number of toys to play with. What are the advantages and disadvantages for the child of having a large number of toys ?

Some kids are loaded with toys by their
parents
. Due to the lack of time to play with them, some
parents
buy
innumerous
Correct your spelling
in numerous
show examples
objects, trying to mitigate the insufficient attention. In
this
essay, I will outline the positive sides and drawbacks of
this
exaggerated gifting to children.
To begin
with, looking at the upsides of
this
trend, kids that notably have lots of toys waste most of their time playing.
For instance
, one case in point would be exemplified by the movie ToyStory. In the movie, the main human character, Andy, has so many objects in his room that the number of playing he created alone were uncountable.
Moreover
, in the case of
a
Change the article
an
show examples
only child, as Andy in the movie, receive a large number of toys to play
would
Change preposition
with would
show examples
help infants to improve
Correct pronoun usage
their
show examples
they
Correct your spelling
the
show examples
creativity, as in the majority, they do not have someone to play with, forcing them to use their imagination to have fun. In stark contrast, there are a
lot
Add the preposition
oflot
show examples
downsides consequent of
this
phenomenon. To illustrate
this
, one study conducted by
psychology
Add an article
the psychology
show examples
department of the State University of Ceará has shown that
parents
who spend some time playing with their children, these minors are more likely to be happier and do not suffer from the lack of tutors attention. Taking the aforementioned example, the same study concluded that children
whom
Correct pronoun usage
whose
show examples
parents
are present and who receive gifts
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
special occasions only
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
tends to grow without
parents
mental linked disorders. To summarize, giving presents to minors is not a setback, since their tutors are gifting them in order to make them feel special and not as a surrogate
attetion
Correct your spelling
attention
.
Submitted by alexandretco on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
    What to do next:
    Look at other essays: