People believe that individuals who make a lot of money are the most successful. Others say that those who contribute to society like scientists, teacher are the most successful. Discuss both and give your opinion?

In
this
day and age, more and more contemporary attention has been placed on the opinion that people possessing a great deal of
money
are the most successful.
However
, others argue that those who have a great contribution to
society
such
as scientists or teachers are the most successful. From my perspective, I subscribe to the latter idea. On the one hand, individuals working in science and education areas are deserved to be the most successful.
This
is explained by the reason that by virtue of the scientists’ determination and effort in studying and inventing helpful and valuable things, the human could have advanced to the point it has today.
For instance
, in the Covid 19 pandemic, if scientists did not study vaccination to treat the Coronavirus,
this
would lead to an accelerating number of deaths, so
society
would have fewer opportunities to develop more.
In addition
, teachers play a crucial role in educating students on how to become good citizens and most importantly, if students are well-educated, they may be dedicated to rendering
society
more developed.
On the other hand
, it is undeniable that those who have a lot of
money
are the most successful.
This
is because depending on each individual’s perspective about success, many ones consider having a large amount of
money
as their most successful achievement in their life,
therefore
, when they may make a great deal of
money
,
this
signifies that they have become the most successful persons. In conclusion, with all the reasons mentioned above, I strongly believe that people making a significant contribution to
society
such
as scientists or teachers are the most successful in lieu of becoming affluent persons.
Submitted by trangslelaidalat on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: