IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

The government is responsible for protecting a nation's cultural identity. Thus, some people believe new buildings should be built in traditional styles. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

#government #nation #identity #people #buildings #styles
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Culture is the core foundation of any country. Ancient buildings and monuments are strong symbols
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
 indicate the richness of the culture.
Hence
, some believe that the new
constructions
 should be
alligned
Correct your spelling
aligned
 in a manner
which
Correct pronoun usage
that
show examples
preserve
Change the verb form
preserves
show examples
 the true identity of the culture. In my view, I am partially agreed with the
afforementioned
Correct your spelling
aforementioned
statment
Correct your spelling
statement
 and I will
further
 illustrate my ideology in the
next
 few paragraphs. The proposed practice is already
inplace
Correct your spelling
in place
 in several
countires
Correct your spelling
countries
. The most popular example is Italy where the new
constructions
 are
throughly
Correct your spelling
thoroughly
 governed with several laws
specially
Replace the word
especially
show examples
 in the areas with
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
ancient
values
. The positive trend is most of the other countries are
also
adhereing
Correct your spelling
adhering
 to the same practice and government and
Correct your spelling
lawmakers
show examples
law makers
Correct your spelling
lawmakers
show examples
 are in a process of imposing new rules. The preservation of cultural
values
 would highly important to the countries which are relying largely on tourism income.
In
Change the preposition
On
show examples
 the contrary, the world is constantly enriching with new and effective engineering and architectural concepts.
Thus
 new
constructions
 could be planned to attain
great
Add an article
a great
show examples
 level of effectiveness and space management.
Moreover
, it would be ideal to use the latest technologies and designs in new
constructions
 rather than
adhereing
Correct your spelling
adhering
 to old designs. The said notions
is
Change the verb form
are
show examples
also
very
Add an article
a very
show examples
 crucial aspect to be looked at considering the significance of space management to cater to the demands of the growing population. In conclusion, it is agreed that preserving the ancient
values
 when constructing the new buildings
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
imparative
Correct your spelling
imperative
.
However
, the said
practice
Correct your spelling
practise
show examples
 should be limited to the areas which
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
 significant ancient
values
 while in other cases to use the most updated technology and designs.
Submitted by harshanab on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: