DOCTORS, NURSED AND TEACHERS MAKE A GREAT CONTRIBUTION TO SOCIETY AND SHOULD BE PAYER MORE THAN ENTERTAINMENT AND SPORTS CELEBRITIES. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE.

#doctors #teachers #contribution #society #payer #entertainment #sports #celebrities

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Essential services are the backbone of a national system. Employees in

this

Linking Words

field bring enormous effort to the community as

compare

Change the form of the verb

compared

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to the superstars in show biz and sports

thus

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need to be compensated better. I strongly agree with the statement

Change preposition

that

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a better salary will help employees to remain focused with a higher probability of retention in jobs.

This

Linking Words

essay shall discuss the reasons with relevant examples why I

am holding

Wrong verb form

hold

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this

Linking Words

view.

Initially

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, Medical and Education staff are working round the clock to help society so should be paid more

while

Linking Words

the people working in entertainment and sports are merely entertaining the public. A satisfied mind brings happiness which strives the workforce to deliver a high level of output without any distraction towards financial needs.

For example

Linking Words

, if scientists have fatty pay and perks which are fulfilling their needs

Correct word choice

apply

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they can be more focused on their jobs without any hindrance.

Therefore

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

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sound financial condition will enhance the focus on work.

Moreover

Linking Words

, to achieve the best from the staff working in emergency services and education sector experience is the key to success. An employee will not leave the job and as they remain in the field will have a better understanding of the system, norms and mission if they were well compensated more than the industry norms.

For instance

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, Professors in universities are provided with all the facilities like comprehensive medical coverage,

free

Correct word choice

and free

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education for their children in order to retain them.

Hence

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, priority should be given to the people working tirelessly to serve the nation in their thankless jobs. In conclusion,

although

Linking Words

every profession has its own place

due to

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the high pressure and intense nature of

job

Correct article usage

the job

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people helping to build society should be compensated more than the other sectors.

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task response

Ensure that all parts of the prompt are addressed in the essay.

coherence cohesion

Make sure that there is a clear logical structure throughout the essay.

lexical resource

Expand the range of vocabulary used and include more advanced vocabulary.

grammatical range

Pay closer attention to grammatical accuracy and sentence structure.

11
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

295 words

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DOCTORS, NURSED AND TEACHERS MAKE A GREAT CONTRIBUTION TO SOCIETY AND SHOULD BE PAYER MORE THAN ENTERTAINMENT AND SPORTS CELEBRITIES. DO YOU AGREE OR DISAGREE.

Tourism is one of the fastest growing industries and contributes a great deal to economies around the world. However, the damage tourism can cause to local cultures and the environment is often ignored. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some companies have uniforms for their staff which must be worn at all times. What are the advantages for a company having a uniform? Are there any benefits of having a uniform for the staff?

Details of politicians private lives should not be published in newspaper. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

some people think that museums should be enjoyable places to entertain people, while others believe that purpose of museums is the educate. discuss both views and give your own opinion.