It has been claimed that workers over 50 are not responsive to rapidly changing ideas in the modern workplace and that for this reason younger workers are to be preferred. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Nowadays, the way a business operates has
Change the verb form
changed
show examples
changes
Correct your spelling
changed
show examples
drastically. As
majority
Add an article
the majority
a majority
show examples
of the work is
technology driven
Add a hyphen
technology-driven
show examples
therefore
changes
happen frequently. If the
employees
are unable to adapt to
such
new circumstances, they would eventually be laid off since they would not be able to add up to the organisation’s growth.
To begin
with, at earlier times people used to carry out tasks manually which resulted in more time and money consumption.
However
, at
present
Add a comma
,present
show examples
the operations are undertaken through technology, machines, artificial intelligence and much more.
As a result
of which the workers have to be updated with those various innovations. The younger generation is able to adapt to
such
kind of variations
Add a hyphen
real-time
show examples
real
Change preposition
in real
show examples
time without putting
Change preposition
in much
show examples
much
Change the quantifier
many
show examples
efforts whereas the long term
employees
, at times, face difficulties in getting used to those
changes
.
Therefore
, the companies prefer young
employees
over
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
older ones.
For instance
, a job which involves working in distinct circumstances and includes a lot of
traveling
Change the spelling
travelling
show examples
would be more suitable for a young employee as he would have a healthy body and zeal in himself.
On the contrary
, it would be highly unjustified on the part of old aged workers if they
are replaces
Change the verb form
are replaced
show examples
just like that. The company should come up with alternatives
such
as staff training, enhance financial compensation to motivate the
employees
for taking over to
changes
.
Moreover
, if a company has just the younger
employees
then
it would not have someone with huge experience who could guide them through. According to
me
Correct pronoun usage
my
show examples
, the companies should try to maintain balance in their
employees
Change to a genitive case
employee's
employees'
show examples
proportion and bring some ideas and initiatives for their old and young
employees
which would result in
overall
Add an article
the overall
show examples
benefit of everyone.
Therefore
, I partially agree with the topic. The younger generation is the future of a country and they should be guided in
a
Correct article usage
the
show examples
right way by the older
employees
.
On the other hand
, the older generation should try to keep pace with the
changes
so that they can work hand in hand with the younger
employees
.
Submitted by harsimrankaur2400 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
What to do next:
Look at other essays: