when new towns are planned, it is important to build more public parks or sports facilities than shopping centres for people to spend their free time. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

#towns #parks #sports #facilities #centres #people #time

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In recent years, due to

innovation

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,innovation

show examples

many new approaches are taken into account. It is believed, that whenever there is

new

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a new

the new

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development of cities or towns it is essential to build more public

parks

or to bring more amenities regarding

sport

rather than building shopping malls. In my notion,

government

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the government

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should construct new towns including public

parks

and

sport

Change the noun form

sports

show examples

facilities

. Town planners should give preferences to

parks

, gardens or sports.

First

and foremost, when there is

planning

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the planning

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of building new city

than

Correct your spelling

then

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parks

and sports should be there because by having public

parks

people

can spend their leisure time with their loved ones.

Furthermore

, they get fresh air since it is less polluted.

However

, by constructing new

parks

people

come together and can communicate with each other which will enhance social gathering.

Moreover

, there will be

utilization

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the utilization

show examples

of phone. According to

recent

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a recent

show examples

report, it was stated that adolescents are more involved in social media platforms and they do not get out of it which results

into

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show examples

health

Add an article

a health

show examples

issue.

Therefore

, more public

parks

should be encouraged.

Secondly

, having

sport

facilities

people

can do daily exercise and they can keep their body fit and healthy.

In addition

people

can do swimming and jogging when the facility is available. A

sport

is played in

group

Add an article

the group

a group

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so there will be more interaction with

people

and

this

will increase the bond between them.

Nevertheless

, by having

this

Correct determiner usage

these

show examples

facilities

adults or children will come out from home.

Consequently

, it reduces the usage of phone and watching television.

Finally

Change preposition

apply

show examples

planning to have these

facilities

can generate revenue. Not only it is beneficial to

people

but

also

to the government. In spite of the fact that by constructing big ground which involved all sports

facilities

can generate income because many games can be played in future in that city.

By contrast

, shopping malls are not needed since online purchase is tremendously increasing. To summarize, I reiterate that while planning to construct new towns planners should build more public

parks

sport

facilities

as it will generate more revenue and make relation closer.

Submitted by Shaunak Desai on Thu Jun 03 2021

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Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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13
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

345 words

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when new towns are planned, it is important to build more public parks or sports facilities than shopping centres for people to spend their free time. To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Some people think that movies should only be for entertainment. Others think they should also have educational value. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Your friend is about to move into a new house. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter offer to help him/her to move explain how exactly you can help ask him/her some questions about the new house

In some countries the average weight of people is increasing and fitness is decreasing. What do you think are the causes of these problems and what measures could be taken to solve them?

In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

Computers are being used more and more in education. Some people say that this is a positive trend, while others argue that it is leading to negative consequences. Discuss both sides of this argument and give your opinion.