IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Many people work long hours, leaving very little time for leisure activities. Does this situation have more advantages or more disadvantages?

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Over the
last
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 decades, the modern lifestyle has pushed
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the
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most population to stay in their workplace. It can be seen mostly that
this
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 kind of lifestyle avoid those people to have fewer entertaining actions. It is believed that being a workaholic person without taking sufficient leisure
time
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, is not beneficial.
This
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 subject will be proven by analysing human
brain
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 rest and family’s relationships aspects.
Firstly
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, as a fact of the human being, our body, especially the
brain
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 needs rest after the long hour
work
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.
For instance
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, research that has been taken place by the University of Queensland in 2019 revealed, the human
brain
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 is designed to get some rewards
such
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 as relaxing after 10
hours
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 of continuous
work
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-related activities.
This
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 example illustrates how the human
brain
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 needs
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the
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entertainment to keep working better.
As a result
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, to be more productive at a workplace, it is required to consider more entertaining activities after
work
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.
Furthermore
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, considering more
time
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 to
work
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 has a detrimental influence on the family’s relationships.
For example
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, People who do not have free
time
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 to spend with their families, due to their long
hours
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 of
work
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, always are more likely to end up in a divorce situation.
Thus
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, it can be seen clearly, those families who spend more
time
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 together are happier and staying together for a long
time
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. In summary, it is accepted spending long
hours
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 at
work
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, without sufficient pleasant
time
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 does not have advantages.
This
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 kind of lifestyle is damaging the human brains and family’s relationships. It is expected, people get encouraged by their employer to entertain themselves more after the long
hours
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 of
work
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.

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Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-life balance
  • mental well-being
  • burnout
  • stress relief
  • productivity
  • economic growth
  • career progression
  • skill enhancement
  • quality time
  • financial security
  • leisure activities
  • physical health
  • personal relationships
  • stress-related illnesses
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