IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 2.5

Some people think that success is the best measure for intelligence, while others believe that intelligence can be measured in other ways. What is your opinion? 12

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This
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 bar chart depicts information about the rate of British inhabitants who are between the 18 and 65+ and are providing wealth to donations between the
year
Use synonyms
 1990 and 2010. Overall, as is shown by the graph, the younger generation was giving more money to charity in the
first
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year
Use synonyms
, while the elderly were transferring less.
However
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, there was an upward trend in the
middle aged
Add a hyphen
middle-aged
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 group and seniors in the
second
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year
Use synonyms
. In 1990, the numbers of charity in 18-25 started with approximately 17%.
Then
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, it gradually increased to just over 30% in 26-35. After that, it jumped to a peak of about 42% in 36-50, which became the highest number in the period.
Moreover
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,
this
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 dropped steadily with 7%, to a percentage of 35% in 51-65.
Finally
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, it
plummet
Change the verb form
plummets
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with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 2,5% in 65 plussers. In 2010, the younger aged group began with almost half of the number as in the
first
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year
Use synonyms
.
However
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,
this
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 increased significantly to just under 25%. From here, there was a gradual rise to 35% in 36-50.
Then
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, it
grow
Change the verb form
grows
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with
Change preposition
by
show examples
 4% in 51-65, which became the biggest number in 2010.
This
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 dropped moderately to 35% in the
last
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 group.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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