IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Some people think that schools should reward students who show the best academic results, while others believe that it is more important to reward students who show improvements. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #schools #reward #students #show #results #improvements
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Some people believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
giving prizes to the
students
 who get the better marks in the final exams is imperative while others think that weak
students
 who
show
 recovery in their
studies
 are more obligatory to be rewarded.
However
, I am with the perspective that, schools should honour the
students
 with good
results
 because it will help to maintain their confidence in their class.
Firstly
,some people be of the point that ,it is more mandatory to provide gifts to
students
 who
show
 changes in their outcome because if teachers praise their efforts to improve their
results
 ,they will get even more confident
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
well as they will tend to ameliorate more in their
studies
.
For example
: In India schools organize a function at the end of the class to announce
results
 and distribute trophies to the
students
 according to their level of marks .
Secondly
, it is indispensable to give awards to the
students
 with the best marks. Rewarding for doing hard work in
examination
Add an article
the examination
an examination
show examples
 is another way to enhance their confidence as well as keeps them on track for doing their
studies
 diligently.
Moreover
, if institutes stop giving prizes to the
students
then
 they might become lazy as well as careless about
studies
 because most of the
students
 studying hard just to stand on the stage in front of the whole school just to make their parents feel proud as well as to gain a different level of attention in their schoolmates.
For example
, the schools annually organize a function to announce final
results
 in which families of the children are
also
 invited and it a precious moment for children to get awarded in front of their parents.
Consequently
, it is
also
 not a bad idea to announce the names of a weak junior who
show
 improvement in their course to make them feel confident. In conclusion, according to me,rewarding
students
 with good
results
 is the best approach to make them feel satisfied but it
also
 a better idea to reward
students
 who
show
 improvements in their
results
Submitted by kumarashish80541 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: