IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Today’s fresh food like vegetables or fruits travels thousands of miles from the rural areas or farms before it reaches customers in cities or urban areas. Why is this? Is this a positive or negative trend?

#today’s #food #vegetables #fruits #thousands #miles #areas #farms #customers #cities #trend
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
we live in a world, where we need
food
Use synonyms
 for survival more than anything.
people
Use synonyms
 who live in big cities do not get fresh
vegetables
Use synonyms
 or fruit while
people
Use synonyms
 who live in rural areas grow their own
food
Use synonyms
 so they get fresh
vegetables
Use synonyms
 and fruits. well, there is a plethora of reasons that why
this
Linking Words
 is not good for city
people
Use synonyms
.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, Moving from one area to another take a long time and more often these trips are not good for freshly packed
food
Use synonyms
.
Firstly
Linking Words
, there is a high chance of fruit or
vegetables
Use synonyms
 are going to get squished because of long-distance drive and by the
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
end
people
Use synonyms
 are going to products that are not good in quality. I still remember
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 I read somewhere, that we throw 20 tons of
food
Use synonyms
 approximately on an everyday basis which is a lot.
Secondly
Linking Words
, there is a chance of fruits or
vegetables
Use synonyms
 getting rotten or stale by the end of travel. which is the 2nd biggest reason for
food
Use synonyms
 shortage in certain areas of the country or province.
In addition
Linking Words
, these trips are not cheap at all.
For instance
Linking Words
, companies like Walmart,
Food
Use synonyms
 basic or Giant tiger spend an average of 300 thousand to 1 million dollars just for one province. To sum up
this
Linking Words
, I think it,s a chance for us to start growing our own
food
Use synonyms
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 so that we can not only consume fresh
food
Use synonyms
 but
also
Linking Words
 save some money for tomorrow. I think Government
also
Linking Words
 make agriculture
subject
Correct article usage
a subject
show examples
 necessary for all grades across Canada.
Submitted by bbaljinderbrar213 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: