IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Some organisations believe that their employees should dress smartly. Others value quality of work above appearance. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#organisations #employees #dress #value #quality #work #appearance
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Nowadays,
although
Linking Words
 a lot of our perspectives have changed compared to previous generations, the instinct of judging others based on their appearance is still there. Some cooperations believe that their employees should dress fashionable but in a formal way, but other people may argue that the result of their performance should not be overlooked by how they look. Personally speaking, I believe that in today society able to dressing smartly plays a predominant factor. Many organisations want their labourers to appeal smartly not only to impress or to create a nice appearance towards their clients but
also
Linking Words
 to elevate the business's image, especially if it is a well-known company. Sad but true that our society still criticises people based on their appearances which can lead to failure to see the quality of their work so employees need to make themselves fit with the standard in order to gain the consumers' attentions.
For example
Linking Words
, Vingroup is one of the biggest cooperation in Vietnam so the business expects their workers to look appropriately whether they are seeing a client or not and or despite if they are working, especially the higher-ups since they can be recognised by their customers or other competitors which can affect the company reputation. While dressing is important, many others still believe that how they convey their job is more vital than the overall appearance since you cannot judge the ability of how they execute their jobs just based on how they dressed.
Moreover
Linking Words
, when they try to sell their idea, they are not selling their face or themselves so dressing smartly can be seen as a minor factor because they are persuading the clients using their own words.
For instance
Linking Words
, many artists, musicians can look very different but do not get criticise because there are groups of people that enjoy their pieces and focus on the progress and result rather than how they look . In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 the quality of an individual task should be appreciated rather than their looks, in today society, I firmly believe that the way that someone's look will play a crucial influence
Submitted by vynguyen300673 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: