Computers are often argued to be the most important invention of the last hundred years. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

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It has been widely discussed about if

computers

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are the most important invention since one hundred years ago. I partially agree with the perspective that

computers

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are important but there are some pros and cons worth discussing. First of all,

computers

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increased women's participation in the workforce, which is an obvious benefit to the economy. After more workers joined the workforce, the

overall

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society could be more productive.

This

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is because the invention of

computers

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created many

jobs

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that do not require physical strength,

such

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as accountants. It allows women to showcase their advantages,

for example

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, their carefulness and awareness of minor mistakes.

However

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, technology developments

also

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pose certain risks.

For instance

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, some low-skilled

jobs

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such

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as customer service and sales, will be replaced by artificial

intelligence

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This

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means that without control, the unemployment rate would increase.

Also

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, technologies

such

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as artificial

intelligence

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would consume a vast amount of electric power. Carbon dioxide, a greenhouse gas, would be emitted indirectly

while

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training those artificial

intelligence

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models through the consumption of electric power.

This

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would contribute to global warming and deplete human resources that could be used for developing other industries.

Furthermore

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computers

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also

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could increase the rate of heart disease.

This

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is because most

jobs

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that are related to

computers

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usually require workers to sit in front of them.

In other words

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, workers who use

computers

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to complete their

jobs

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do not get enough exercise, which increases the risk of heart disease.

Additionally

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, because users often do not rest their eyes

while

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watching screens, they might become short-sighted.

To conclude

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, I believe

computers

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should be considered an important invention, but not the most important.

However

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, we need to take actions

such

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as educating people to use them in a healthy way or instituting laws to mitigate artificial

intelligence

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's impact on the economy.

jamexhuangSun Nov 17 2024

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task achievement

The essay could benefit from a clearer stance on whether computers are the most important invention, with more elaboration on the importance compared to other inventions.

task achievement

The second point regarding the negative impacts lacks specific and relevant examples. Consider using statistics or case studies to strengthen the argument.

coherence cohesion

Craft sentences with varied structures to enhance clarity and readability, thereby improving overall coherence and cohesion.

introduction conclusion present

The essay presents a clear introduction and conclusion that frame the discussion well, showing thoughtful consideration of the task.

supported main points

Main points are well supported, with pros and cons clearly outlined, contributing to a balanced analysis.

12
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

302 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

invention
revolutionized
industries
communication
connectivity
productivity
efficiency
advancements
scientific research
technology
access
information
learn
limitations
disadvantages

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Art classes, such as painting and drawing, are as important as other subjects to a child’s development, and they should be compulsory in high school. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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In the current society, many people are struggling with obesity. What are the main causes of this? What are the effects?

Parent allowed their children use ipad. Do yo agree or disagree?

Most people are not interested in how their food has been produced. They only care about how much it costs. To what extent to you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience