Extreme sports such as sky diving and skiing are very dangerous and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this view?
Nowadays
sports
play a very essential role in the personality development of an individual. but some people think that uttermost Use synonyms
sports
like free fall and skiing are extremely risky and authorities should ban Use synonyms
Linking Words
this
. Correct pronoun usage
them
This
essay will explain why I disagree with the above statement.
Linking Words
To begin
with, it is important to understand that extreme Linking Words
sports
build courage and refresh mental state. Use synonyms
Sports
Use synonyms
itself has
many benefits Wrong verb form
have
such
as Linking Words
it enhances
leadership qualities and comradeship Wrong verb form
enhancing
however
extreme Linking Words
sports
Use synonyms
such
as freefall and skiing Linking Words
was
not only Verb problem
apply
eliminating
fear but Wrong verb form
eliminate
also
help Linking Words
in
Change preposition
apply
distraction
from a stressful life. Replace the word
distract
While
playing Linking Words
such
Linking Words
sports
the adrenalin rush in the body and that Feeling is very rewarding and pleasing. Use synonyms
such
athletes are known as the daredevils because of the stunts that they Perform Linking Words
while
playing Linking Words
such
Linking Words
sports
. Use synonyms
Thus
participating in demanding Linking Words
sports
not only refreshes your mind but Use synonyms
also
kicks the scare factor.
Having said that, it is important to know that safety measures shouldn’t be ignored Linking Words
while
playing extreme Linking Words
sports
. Use synonyms
although
extremely demanding Linking Words
sports
could be fun but very risky at the same time so athletes who play Use synonyms
such
games should follow all the standard operating procedures and rules to achieve their goal and Linking Words
get
success in that particular sport. Verb problem
achieve
For instance
, in freefall, the instructor should check if the parachute belt is tight before commencing the Jump Linking Words
similarly
Linking Words
while
in skiing, it’s the athlete's responsibility to report any problem that he faces. Linking Words
Therefore
safety procedures are highly important to be followed by athletes who play extreme Linking Words
sports
.
In conclusion, Use synonyms
Although
it might seem quite risky to play extreme Linking Words
sports
. Use synonyms
however
, if safety procedures are followed, these could be very rewarding and enviable Linking Words
sports
to play.Use synonyms
Submitted by gsingla730 on
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task achievement
Strengthen the task response by providing more detailed examples and evidence to support your arguments.
coherence cohesion
Ensure clearer transitions between ideas to enhance coherence.
coherence cohesion
The essay presents a clear and relevant introduction and conclusion, effectively framing the argument.
coherence cohesion
Logical structure and progression of ideas are generally well-maintained throughout the essay.
task achievement
The essay addresses the task directly with a clear stance against the banning of extreme sports.