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Writing Samples
Band 4.5

Some say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their spare time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#say #parents #children #part #group #activities #time
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It is undeniable fact,
Children
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 are the future of
nation
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the nation
a nation
show examples
. It is believed by some, pupils should be motivated by their
parents
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 to participate in
team
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activities
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 in their free time , while others masses advocate, that it is pivotal for minors to learn how to engage themselves in groups
activities
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by
Change preposition
on
show examples
 their own.
This
Linking Words
 essay will examine both the arguments and draws a logical conclusion in end. To commence with, there are
plethora
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a plethora
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 of reasons which say
parents
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 should stimulate their
children
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 to take part in groups competitions.
Linking Words
First
Correct article usage
The first
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 and foremost reason is that groups
activities
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 teach how to develop mutual understanding with
team
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 members .
Thus
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parents
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 believe that group
activities
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 teach their
children
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 how to make great rapport with everyone
that is
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 why
parents
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 encourage them for participating in
team
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activities
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.
Secondly
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,
parents
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 believe that group
activities
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 give their
children
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 chances to learn leadership
term
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terms
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not only
this
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 , they
also
Linking Words
 believe that group
activities
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 teach
the
Correct article usage
apply
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management skills.
For instance
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, if a child is a captain of the school cricket
team
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 as captain he would have to manage other players and other small things like; time management and discipline.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, some individuals reckon that
children
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 should be enough mature to participate in
competition
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the competition
a competition
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 on their own without having any discussion with their guardians.
Firstly
Linking Words
, it is a positive development if
children
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 involved themselves to take part in
competition
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the competition
a competition
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 by doing they get to learn the value of competitiveness and they are being aware of different schooling
activities
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. In conclusion,
although
Linking Words
 it is correct
at
Change preposition
to
show examples
 some extent that
children
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 should be aware
about
Change the preposition
of
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 participating in different
activities
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 in schools by themselves but , yet believe that they are vulnerable at that stage of their life so they could not understand the real motive behind competitions so their
parents
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 should definitely stimulate their
children
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 about organised
team
Use synonyms
activities
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by Shaunak Desai on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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