In some countries in Europe, some children from the age of 11 or 13 go to schools to learn more practical skills that will help them get a job. Other children stay in schools which provide a more general academic education. What should schools do to prepare students for the world of work?

Many European countries are mainly focused on practical experience and prepare
children
at the age of 11 to 13 for
real
Correct article usage
the real
show examples
world's job market. Whereas, opponents believe that
children
should complete their education before starting working actually. It is true that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the real working environment is very challenging and demands lots of skills and practical knowledge, even at the
first
job. Due to
this
reason many qualifications had made it compulsory to complete some years of training or artisanship to be fully qualified.
This
is majorly to avoid unemployment in future, due to lack of experience.
Also
, it is
help-full
Correct your spelling
helpful
show examples
for the students to start working at the initial stage
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
because they will be having theoretical knowledge fresh in their mind and would be able to implement
more
Correct pronoun usage
it more
show examples
efficiently.
On the other hand
, it should
also
not neglect that
children
who start working at
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
early stage, might be at various risks. There is
chance
Add an article
a chance
the chance
show examples
that students, who start earning money, will get
use
Change the verb form
used
show examples
too of it and might drop their
further
studies at
very
Add an article
a very
the very
show examples
preliminary stage.
Furthermore
, there is
additional
Add an article
an additional
the additional
show examples
risk that these
children
might misuse the money they receive as
stipend
Add an article
a stipend
show examples
from their new jobs.
Also
, some
children
may consider
this
as
extra
Add an article
the extra
show examples
pressure and might drop studies or work. To conclude, it is beneficial to encounter pupils
with
Change preposition
in
show examples
real world's work environment and let them
to
Change the verb form
apply
show examples
know, how they should face
this
. But
this
should not be imposed on them to work compulsorily to achieve their educational certificates; there should be flexibility in these things.
Submitted by MK on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!
Topic Vocabulary:
  • vocational training programs
  • curriculum
  • critical thinking
  • problem-solving
  • communication skills
  • career guidance
  • counseling
  • internships
  • apprenticeships
  • local industries
  • businesses
  • digital literacy
  • technological skills
  • entrepreneurship
  • innovation
  • financial literacy
  • budgeting
  • teamwork
  • collaboration
What to do next:
Look at other essays: