In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to hard work in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? what solutions can you suggest?

#countries #people #leisure #time #pressure #work #studies

There is no doubt that there

are

Change the verb form

show examples

a lot of pressure on teenagers in

school

and university.Nowadays, students are having hard times working on their homework and projects with insufficient free time. In

this

essay, I will explore some of the problems associated with stress in

school

and propose some solutions One problem in

school

parents

expectation

Fix the agreement mistake

expectations

show examples

For example

father

Correct article usage

the father

show examples

and mother of a high

school

student

tend to convince their child to work hard for

grade

This

is an issue because it does not mean that the result will always meet their goal. To solve

this

problem, family members must not set the standard too high and try to encourage more.

As a result

, the

student

will be more comfortable and have

motivation

Change the article

the motivation

show examples

to try harder for one's family. Another issue is competition among

classmate

Fix the agreement mistake

classmates

show examples

For example

, a

student

who receives

grade

B may

ashame

Correct your spelling

shame

oneself

Correct pronoun usage

himself

show examples

because there is another

student

who receives

grade

This

causes the

student

who

get

Change the verb form

gets

show examples

lower

Add an article

the lower

show examples

grade

Fix the agreement mistake

grades

show examples

to be

Change preposition

under

show examples

pressure and study harder to compete with the genius in the same class. To solve

this

problem,

parents

should try to teach their children to not underestimate themselves and everybody has one's own

favorite

Change the spelling

favourite

show examples

topic.

As a result

, the

student

will stop racing with others and be more self-respect. In conclusion,

although

students face a variety of problems,

such

parents

expectation

Fix the agreement mistake

expectations

show examples

and competition among

classmate

Fix the agreement mistake

classmates

show examples

, these problems are

Correct your spelling

not

show examples

mot

Correct your spelling

not

show examples

insurmountable. In my view, it is the

parents

responsbility

Correct your spelling

responsibility

to solve these issues, and they should begin by considering some of the

solution

Fix the agreement mistake

solutions

show examples

proposed above.

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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
18Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

265 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

high expectations
academic success
future success
competitive nature
modern education systems
top grades
prestigious universities
high-paying jobs
rise of technology
social media platforms
physical activities
relaxation
extracurricular demands
multiple responsibilities
economic factors
lower-income families
part-time jobs
academic pressures

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In some countries young people have little leisure time and are under a lot of pressure to hard work in their studies. What do you think are the causes of this? what solutions can you suggest?

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

In recent years, more and more people tend to live individually. What are the causes of this trend? Does this have a positive or negative effect on society?

Some people think that the range of technology currently available is increasing the gap between rich people and poor people. Others think that it is causing the opposite effect. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries, students leave high school without learning how to manage their money. Why is that the case? What could be done to tackle the issue? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Many university students want to learn about different subjects in addition to their main subjects. Others feel it is important to give all their time and attention to studying for their qualification.

Many governments think that economic progress is the most important goal. Some think that the other type of progress is equally important. Discuss both views and give your opinion.