Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society.

#people #aim #university #education #graduates #jobs #individuals #society

These days many and more

people

are choosing to go to

Add an article

the

show examples

educational

institution

Fix the agreement mistake

institutions

show examples

. while some

people

have their opinions about the university is to improve jobs or to provide benefits to the

person

and

community

.I am going to describe both sides and shared my opinion on it.

To begin

with, these days every

person

want to excel, not just in life but

also

want to secure a task.

In other words

, individuals who are attending universities have a goal to get

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

decent

work

after graduation.It is certain that attending higher education help them to gain marketable skills and attract potential employers.

For example

, when I was studying in college, I always plan to get

Remove the article

work

a job

show examples

work

and

work

for Multinational companies.

Secondly

, the education institution

also

cares a lot about their reputation and student placement for future funding.

On the other hand

, there are other benefits for

person

and

community

First

people

who are choosing university away from their home town, learn how to interact with

people

more frequently.It

also

help them to grow and built their confidence, helps them to explore the

World

Correct your spelling

world

show examples

around them and make new friends.At the same time, it helps the

community

, to boost their revenue by providing flats for

rents

Fix the agreement mistake

rent

show examples

or setup local shops

such

a selling books, foods, daily use material etc. to conclude, I believe, the main motive of educational college is to help students to get

Remove the article

work

a job

show examples

work

, there are clearly other benefits to

person

and

community

Submitted by mukeshkumar151294 on Tue Jul 13 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

5 paragraphs

245 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Buying things on the Internet, such as books, air tickets and groceries, is becoming more and more popular. Do the advantages of shopping in this way outweigh the disadvantages?

107.Some say that music is a good way of bringing people from different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

In the today’s world, many people own a smartphone. Do you think the advantages of owning a smartphone outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people think that it is best to live in a horizontal city while others think of a vertical city. Discuss both views and give your opinion

Multinational companies are becoming increasingly common in developing countries. What are the advantages and disadvantages of this?