IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some believe that schools should reward students who show the best academic results, while other think it is more important to reward students who show progress. Discuss both views and express your own opinion?

#believe #schools #reward #students #show #results #progress
Rewarding for any achievements are considered a life-changing moment. Some people think that those who show the best academic results ought to be rewarded, while others believe that rewards should have given to those who show progress in their curriculum.
This
 essay will discuss
both
 views in detail. In my opinion,
both
 categories to be awarded equally. On the one hand, rewarding the best performers in their academics is an important factor. Young
students
 start their education in schools and appreciation motivates them automatically as well as bring discipline. They become proud when recognition comes in front of the other pupils.
Thus
, forcing them to maintain their achievements in the long run.
For example
, any kind of appreciation helps individuals to perform well in their professional life when they get into any job.
As a result
, future goals can be achieved by young adults in a proper manner.
On the other hand
, not all
students
 have the inborn talent to become successful in their education. So, it is important to encourage
students
 who show steady progress consistently. The process of improvement may be slow;
however
, it is essential to keep appreciating young children.
For instance
, it helps them to put tremendous effort into themselves to compete with others.
Therefore
, it leads to healthy competition among children. I believe that
both
students
 ought to be equally appreciated. It is the responsibility of schools to make guidelines to bring everyone as a better person according to their progress. In conclusion, it is understood that the best
students
 in their academic results and the one who shows an improvement are eligible to receive rewards.
This
 will help them in the near future to become better people in their
both
 personal and professional life.
Submitted by Vijay Pandurangan on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: