IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

Establishing good relationships in the workplace is not important, as the primary goal of every person is to focus on work. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#relationships #workplace #person #focus #work
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
In nowaday’s society, relationships among workers have become
suprinsingly
Correct your spelling
surprisingly
 important in the
workplace
Use synonyms
.
People
Use synonyms
 tend to
work
Use synonyms
 hard to gain their desire wages and access to a better life standard.
However
Linking Words
, the main issue is that many
people
Use synonyms
 claim that establishing appropriate relationships in the
workplace
Use synonyms
 is not considered
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
a priority, they may
focus
Use synonyms
 particularly on their own
work
Use synonyms
 and behaviour. In my opinion,
this
Linking Words
 statement has both positive and negative sides to discuss as everyone has different perspectives, some of them might extensively
focus
Use synonyms
 on their
work
Use synonyms
 while
others
Use synonyms
 do not.
To begin
Linking Words
 with, It is true that
people
Use synonyms
 usually
focus
Use synonyms
 on their
task
Use synonyms
 as their
first
Linking Words
 insight. They often perform well in the company to receive higher incomes and
this
Linking Words
 might ask them to dedicate more time
on
Change preposition
to
show examples
 the
task
Use synonyms
 to gain
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
good feedback from the boss.
For instance
Linking Words
, In undeveloped countries,
people
Use synonyms
 tend to make more efforts in their
workplace
Use synonyms
 in order to be survived.
As a result
Linking Words
, working hard has been their duty, they tend to put more
preserverance
Correct your spelling
perseverance
 while completing a
task
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, I believe establishing
good
Add an article
a good
show examples
relationship
Fix the agreement mistake
relationships
show examples
 is
also
Linking Words
 tremendous, especially when completing
coorperate
Correct your spelling
corporate
cooperate
work
Use synonyms
 and it has become the main
focus
Use synonyms
 of some corporations nowadays.
For instance
Linking Words
, relations among workers, managers and
others
Use synonyms
 are considered as an important behaviour. They can have a discussion together to develop the main purpose of the
task
Use synonyms
.
Ut
Correct your spelling
It
show examples
 can be seen
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
 productive way for employees to gather together to complete an assignment, it is reasonable because each of them has different expertise in the field and could lead the
task
Use synonyms
 achievement more effective. To sum up, I believe that
gathring
Correct your spelling
gathering
 together and establishing relationships among
others
Use synonyms
 in a company is subliminal, it can
assit
Correct your spelling
assist
people
Use synonyms
 to make new relatives and the ability to communicate well in society. In conclusion, I think creating a relationship in the
workplace
Use synonyms
 has both an against and for, it definitely depends on
people
Use synonyms
’s perspectives of how they see the society, some of them may find that
focus
Use synonyms
 on
work
Use synonyms
 is better while
others
Use synonyms
 think by gathering in a small group might help you to make an achievement faster.
Submitted by ceciliachen004 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: