Some people think that children can learn about history by visiting museums, while others feel that there are better ways to learn about history. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

People have various opinions about whether visiting museums is more influential in acquiring knowledge about
history
or that more effective methods are available for
children
. On the one hand, the advocates of the
first
view consider the benefits that visiting exhibitions
involves
Change the verb form
involve
show examples
.
Firstly
,
children
have the opportunity to see historical items in person, which could offer an accurate understanding
about
Change preposition
of
show examples
past
time
Fix the agreement mistake
times
show examples
.
For example
, by seeing old plates ,forks, spoons that are exhibited,
children
could realize the ways that their ancestors had been eating food.
In addition
, spectators could experience old-fashion lifestyles which could be truly attractive for
children
and bring about learning those points immediately.
For instance
, some exhibitions allow
children
to wear historical clothes or spend time in places that are built like ancient structures. In doing so, visiting museums could teach valuable lessons about
history
to
children
. Others,
however
, believe that other manners could be more effective
on
Change preposition
in
show examples
learning
history
like reading books or watching documentaries. Regarding reading books, almost all aspects of
history
are explained in
details
Fix the agreement mistake
detail
show examples
. Namely, structures, ceremonies, food, occupations, sanitation status and medicine. So,
children
could figure out how ancient people had experiences life comprehensively. As far as documentaries are concerned, thanks to modern technology,
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
movies are produced by animation producers, which clearly illustrate human beings of the past. These programs usually cover invaluable information and could be undoubtedly influential. Since
children
could find out about not only the ambience of those eras
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
all items that were used.
Therefore
, other sources of data could be really worthwhile for learning
history
due to their accuracy. I sit on the fence in
this
regard.
Although
exhibitions have some undeniable upsides, books and documentaries contain compelling
contents
Fix the agreement mistake
content
show examples
. I believe that using all of these categories simultaneously could
renders
Change the verb form
render
show examples
learning
history
more enjoyable and convenient. Whether museums or other ways are more practical for familiarizing
children
with
history
is debatable.
Submitted by azaderahmani1990 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: