Crime appear to be rising in most countries in the word, especially among young people. Identify the possible cause of this trend, and propose some solutions you think would be effective.

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These days,
crime
Use synonyms
may frequently
be occurred
Wrong verb form
occur
show examples
in both developed and developing countries, and
Rephrase
apply
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also
Linking Words
criminals may tend to be younger than ever before.
This
Linking Words
essay will discuss three main causes associated with the
crime
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and suggest three possible
solution
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solutions
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. Perhaps, the major factor here is
education
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program
that is
Linking Words
related to
prevent from doing
Wrong verb form
preventing
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crime
Use synonyms
is not sufficient in
Use synonyms
education
Add an article
the education
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curriculum.
This
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means that school
not
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do not
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almost warns students may commit petty
crime
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such
Linking Words
as
intimidate
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intimidating
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elderly people, playing truant and
drop
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dropping
show examples
litter which
are
Verb problem
apply
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potentially
opening
Wrong verb form
opens
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a pathway
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
to more serious crimes later on. Another factor may be
macro economic
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macroeconomic
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crises that
influenced
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influence
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on
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apply
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family
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the family
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budget
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budgets
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and standard of living.
This
Linking Words
decreasing revenue contributes people to
commit
Wrong verb form
committing
show examples
Use synonyms
crime
Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
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for their living costs and even just
surviving
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survival
show examples
expenses. A third factor is that
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parents
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parents'
parent's
show examples
care for their children
is
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
may
decreasing
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decrease
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continuously and
this
Linking Words
may lead to more children
attend
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attending
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a little
crime
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, especially in poor countries. The
times
Capitalize word
Times
show examples
recently reported that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
most criminals
are
Verb problem
do
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not
received
Wrong verb form
receive
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adequate favor
by
Change preposition
from
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their
parents
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and
care-taker
Correct your spelling
caretakers
show examples
. Turning to possible solutions, there should be more CCTV cameras and policies in the streets, and these have
effect
Add an article
an effect
show examples
on some thefts and robberies people commit. A second remedy is that
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Education
Correct article usage
the Education
show examples
minister should add study programs about violence and vandalism in primary
school
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schools
show examples
. If
such
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courses were more available, it would reduce the
crime
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action to some extent.
Finally
Linking Words
,
parents
Use synonyms
should increase their child-care and use some GPS technology that reveals children to avoid doing truancy. In conclusion, the factors of
luck
Correct your spelling
lack
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of
education
Use synonyms
, economic turmoil and
Use synonyms
parents
Change noun form
parents'
parent's
show examples
care appear to be
Correct article usage
the
show examples
main causes. More detection
camera
Fix the agreement mistake
cameras
show examples
, curriculum and modern technology would lessen the severity of the situation.
Submitted by alexstudyin on

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

  • firstly
  • secondly
  • thirdly
  • in additional
  • moreover
  • also
  • for example
  • for instance
  • therefore
  • however
  • although
  • even though
  • despite

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