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Writing Samples
Band 6

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The charts below show the percentage of water used for different purposes in six areas of the world. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
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The pie charts depict the percentage of
water
Use synonyms
 consumed for different purposes in six areas of the world,
such
Linking Words
 as North
America
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, South
America
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, Europe, Africa, Central
Asia
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 and South East
Asia
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. The chart is divided into three sectors where
water
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 is used
such
Linking Words
 as industrial, agricultural and domestic.
Futher
Correct your spelling
Further
 more, the majority of usage falls under agricultural purposes for the countries
such
Linking Words
 as South
America
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with
Change preposition
at
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 71%, South East
Asia
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with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 81%, Africa
with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 84% and Central
Asia
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with
Change preposition
at
show examples
 88%, with exceptions of countries
such
Linking Words
 as North
America
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 with 39% and Europe with 32%. Domestic use can be categorised as a meagre consumption in all six areas of the world, with the highest usage in South
America
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, with 19%.
Moreover
Linking Words
, the industrial sector has a minuscule consumption of
water
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 in countries
such
Linking Words
 as South East
Asia
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, Central
Asia
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, Africa and South
America
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, unlike North
America
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 and Europe with 53% consumption of
water
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.

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "such".
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase your introduction. Words match: 70%.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words water, america, asia with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.
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Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "charts" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • water consumption
  • agricultural, industrial, domestic
  • usage patterns
  • developed vs developing regions
  • irrigation systems
  • climate factors
  • percentage breakdown
  • water management
  • sustainability
  • residential water use
  • efficiency
  • charts comparison
  • water-intensive
  • water scarcity
  • resource allocation
  • desalination
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