With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered and some are even facing extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What can be done to protect animal?

#deforestation #development #species #extinction #animals

These days, when human life is facing climate change, global warming,

disappearence

Correct your spelling

disappearance

of some animal species, scientists have been calling all people to save Earth and the living

environment

However

, some people seemly ignore these problems. In my opinion, I do agree that saving

creatures

is essential and there are many different ways to be taken immediately.

Firstly

, it is a fact that animal species should be preserved because they are a part of biodiversity and nature.

Human

Fix the agreement mistake

Humans

show examples

need an ecosystem and a healthy living

environment

which

Correct pronoun usage

that

show examples

has been established from plants and

creatures

. An ecosystem supplies humans with food, fresh water and air, raw materials.

For example

forest

Fix the agreement mistake

forests

show examples

and

ocean

Fix the agreement mistake

oceans

show examples

absorb greenhouse gas, plants reduce

storm

Fix the agreement mistake

storms

show examples

, floods and droughts.

Moreover

creatures

living in the forests are responsible for the development of their habitats.

For instance

mamals

Correct your spelling

mammals

and birds would disperse seeds around the forest. It is terrible that extinction or reduction of some species would affect significantly

Change preposition

apply

show examples

an ecosystems

Correct the article-noun agreement

ecosystems

an ecosystem

show examples

Additionally

, preservation

creatures

and their habitats need to acquire fast due to the human living

environment

by many different methods.

Firstly

, the more population growth rate is rising the more the influence of human causes natural

environment

, so

this

rate should be reduced along with wasted food.

Secondly

, the governments should give production standards for clearing plants to get wood as well as they

also

punish if anyone overcome the limitation.

Thirdly

, one of the best

way

Change to a plural noun

ways

show examples

to protect animals is that consumers should not buy products made from animals and change their eating habits to be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

vegeterian

Correct your spelling

vegetarian

. In conclusion, it is certainly adequate that

creatures

are more important than some people think. It is predicted that governments , communities, companies have been aware of

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

animal preservation and the ecosystem and

finally

taken more ways effectively.

Submitted by hotuanhitech on Tue Jul 27 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

11Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
13Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

299 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 checks
Get all the feedback you need to keep improving your charts and letters.
Unlimited Task 2 checks
Practice and perfect your skills with essays.
Personalized suggestions
Know how to boost your score.
Detailed mistakes analysis
Get instant feedback. Spot every mistake.
Topic ideas generator
Get topic-specific ideas to enhance your writing.
Vocabulary helper
Get the right words for any topic.
Progress tracking
Track your writing improvements.

Topic Vocabulary:

deforestation
urban development
illegal hunting
endangered species
extinction
ecological balance
ecosystems
pollination
seed dispersal
population control
biodiversity
resilience
intrinsic value
economic benefits
tourism
agriculture
legislation
wildlife protection laws
illegal hunting
wildlife reserves
marine protected areas
public awareness
conservation
community involvement
sustainable practices
scientific research
conservation strategies

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

5
band
In the past, most working people had only one job. However, nowadays, more and more people have more than one job at the same time. What are the reasons for this development? What are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?
In modern society, some people tend to have multiple jobs. This is because they need amounts of money in capitalism. In reality, multiple jobs lead to that individuals can earn more money, however, they can easily lose their healthy lifestyles.
<4
band
Some people think that governments should spend public money on saving minority languages, Others, however, believe that would be a waste of public money. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.
some people believe that the govermants need to spend some of the public money to save the minority languages, however other people think that is just wasting money to save the minority languages, and the govermants should svae the money some something more important then just a minority languages, in this essay we will look is both sides and i will draw my personal conclusion.
4
band
You recently attended a training course for your work. Your employer has asked you for your feedback on the training course. Write a letter to your employe. In your letter • remind your employer what the course was about • explain why the course was useful to you in your work • suggest why the course may not be suitable for some of your other Colleagues
How are you? I am writing this letter to give some feedback about effects of buffer training course and improvement in future. Firstly, I have learned robot machanism with detail controlling besides alarm code researching included. This skill will make process more smooth in peak season without machines halted on alarm. I am appreciate to have this chance to joined this course, due to my age younger than Jone, in another word, my reactions of any situation is better than his. As my suggestion, this course will not suit him very well. I will try my best on this position with all I know. Thank you for put my name in course.
6.5
band
Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?
It is certainly true that there are a number of varied subjects for children in schools. There is an ongoing debate whether different areas like music, art, and drama should be given equal priority similar to academic subjects in schools. I strongly agree with this opinion because this helps children to have alternative career options and also they play the role of extracurricular activities for relaxation from their regular studies.
8
band
In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?
In this era, some company establishes an innovative way to market their products through preliminary introductions about their products is the first among others. In my opinion, this is a positive development for businesses, there are several reasons for that.

With deforestation, urban development and illegal hunting, many animal species are becoming endangered and some are even facing extinction. Do you think it is important to protect animals? What can be done to protect animal?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In the past, most working people had only one job. However, nowadays, more and more people have more than one job at the same time. What are the reasons for this development? What are the advantages and disadvantages of having more than one job?

Some people think that governments should spend public money on saving minority languages, Others, however, believe that would be a waste of public money. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some say that music, art and drama are as important as other school subjects, especially at the primary level. Do you agree or disagree?

In their advertising, businesses nowadays usually emphasise that their products are new in some way. Why is this? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?