To summarise, going to school creates study competition and helps scholars mature. For these reasons, it is cleart that face-to-face learning affect children academic achievement and relationship development deeply.

#summarise #school #study #competition #scholars #cleart #children #achievement #relationship #development

It is

common

Add an article

a common

show examples

belief that kids can

study

Change the preposition

show examples

the internet

instead

of going to school because everything can be learned online.

However

, I firmly believe that face-to-face learning is much

Change the word

apply

show examples

better whereas students are motivated academically and competitively by their peers.

Furthermore

, they are become more mature by socializing with friends and from that their

relationship

Fix the agreement mistake

relationships

show examples

are

Change the verb form

show examples

expanded.

To begin

with

Add a comma

,with

show examples

children are motivated by competing with their classmates.

For instance

, schoolers usually desire to show their

fellowers

Correct your spelling

followers

that they are more knowledgeable and can achieve higher scores. Competition plays an important role in the classroom where youngsters are

transmissed

Correct your spelling

transmission

transmitted

the same knowledge in the same place. One clear example is most of my friends said that their fellow classmates motivated them to

study

more than teachers do.

This

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

proof that peers significant impact on

pupils’s

Remove the s

pupils’

show examples

study

achievement.

Additionally

, talking to people in person allows children to grow their emotions through cultivating

Add an article

a relationship

show examples

relationship

Fix the agreement mistake

relationships

show examples

with other adolescents. People who are taught in the same class help them grow emotionally by providing them

informations

Change the wording

information

pieces of information

show examples

, experiences and

trusts

Fix the agreement mistake

trust

show examples

Consequently

this

is can give assistance to juveniles

develop

Fix the infinitive

to develop

show examples

Correct article usage

the

show examples

ability to control their emotions better. To illustrate,

Correct your spelling

one

show examples

Correct your spelling

one

show examples

study

shows that adolescents learn how to suffer and control their tempers by interacting with others.

This

demonstrates how important social relationships affect

kids’s

Remove the s

kids’

show examples

emotional development.

Submitted by nhatrangthanyeu2013 on Tue Jul 27 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Learn how to write high-scoring essays with powerful words.
Download Free PDF and start improving you writing skills today!

Do you want to check your IELTS essays?

Submit unlimited essays, letters and charts. Sign up right now and start improving your writing skills.

8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
19Grammar mistakes
 

3 paragraphs

224 words

<4

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

6.5
band
Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subject. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give own opinion.
One of the widely discussed issues nowadays is that some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subject. While, others believe it is essential to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification.
<4
band
Students generally prefer to choose the period they are supposed to study and the period they are free to have fun. They should be allowed to do their time management. Do you agree or disagree?
Most students in educational system is free to choose what type of activity they could do. Although it might be difficult for some learners to manage their study, it is important to allow students to identify activities by themselves. However, it will help them to get a usefull experience how to manage time and be more responsible for their study process and marks.
4
band
A friends of yours is thinking of going on a camping holiday for the first time this summer. She has asked for your advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter Explain why you think your friend would enjoy a camping holiday Describe some possible disadvantages
What's up dear? How about your holiday. Um... my holiday was so engaging and memorable for me. Recently, I off to the camp with my sister. The camp was so gigantic and interesting. However, The Camp has some disadvantages.
7
band
In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?
Some notions in various societies show curiosity and interest in learning about the background story of the area and place they are living. To me, this is because there might be some interesting stories behind the doors, and getting to know the person who has lived in that particular house, and asking neighbours in the neighbourhood or using the Internet can be helpful regarding that.
5
band
Computer and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online educaion. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?
In digital age, AI technology and computers are being opted as essential devices for supporting education. This writer believes that modern applications will improve the study quality with the benefit of bringing necessary technological pieces of knowledge in the future.

To summarise, going to school creates study competition and helps scholars mature. For these reasons, it is cleart that face-to-face learning affect children academic achievement and relationship development deeply.

Include an introduction and conclusion

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Some university students want to learn about other subjects in addition to their main subject. Others believe it is more important to give all their time and attention to studying for a qualification. Discuss both these views and give own opinion.

Students generally prefer to choose the period they are supposed to study and the period they are free to have fun. They should be allowed to do their time management. Do you agree or disagree?

A friends of yours is thinking of going on a camping holiday for the first time this summer. She has asked for your advice. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter Explain why you think your friend would enjoy a camping holiday Describe some possible disadvantages

In some countries, more and more people are becoming interested in finding out about the history of the house or building they live in. What are the reasons for this? How can people research this?

Computer and A.I. technology are increasingly being used for online educaion. Can artificial intelligence enhance the learning experience? Is this a positive or negative development?