IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 5

Some people think it´s better to choose friends who always have the same opinions as them. Other people believe it´s good to have friends who sometimes disagree with them. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

#people #it´s #friends
Having
friends
 that share the same views is prefered by a portion of the population,
on the other
hand
Add the comma(s)
,hand
show examples
 that are
people
 that prefers some level of disagreement
on
Change preposition
with
show examples
 their
group
 of
friends
. In my
opinion
Add a comma
,opinion
show examples
 a
certin
Correct your spelling
certain
amout
Correct your spelling
amount
 of
diversity
Add an article
the diversity
a diversity
show examples
 of thought is healthy and contributes
for
Change preposition
to
show examples
 personal development. To interact with
people
 that always agree and share the same opinions can be very
confortable
Correct your spelling
comfortable
 and reassuring.
Usually
Add a comma
,Usually
show examples
that is
 how a strong social
group
 is formed. Great
exemples
Correct your spelling
examples
 of these are political parties and religious groups.
Therefore
,
people
 that think it is better to interact with
friends
 that have the same opinions might have stronger beliefs and feel safer in a cohesive and
homogenious
Correct your spelling
homogenous
homogeneous
group
.
On the other hand
, to interact and be
friends
 with
people
 that have different views and sometimes disagree is
usully
Correct your spelling
usually
prefred
Correct your spelling
preferred
 by
people
 that have an open mind, that
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 not as much as passionate about central values
such
 as religion, and for that
Correct your spelling
reason
reson
Add a comma
,reson
show examples
 they might feel that being in a diverse
group
 makes them better individuals. To conclude, I personally prefer to have
friends
 that disagree sometimes. Because usually
this
a
Add a missing verb
is a
show examples
sign that I am part of
group
Add an article
a group
the group
show examples
that is
 inclusive,
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
embraces different backgrounds and
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
is formed by individuals that enjoy a variety of activities and subjects.
Thus
,
this
 is the type of environment that I would like to grow and make
conections
Correct your spelling
connections
. Being able to respect
diversity
Add an article
the diversity
show examples
 of
oppinion
Correct your spelling
opinion
 is an important skill and is central for a better world.
Submitted by dricaribeiro83 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: