the education of young people is highly prioritized in many countries. However teaching adults who cannot write or read is even more important and government should spend more money on this. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
It is a conspicuous fact that educated citizens contribute to the growth and prosperity of a nation. As a ,
result
Add the preposition
inresult
fromresult
show examples
many nations give significant importance to schooling their younger generation. There are many who believe that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
illiterate adults are more in need of literacy than the former group and
hence
Linking Words
more money should be spent on them. Despite
this
Linking Words
being a valid viewpoint, I believe that educated children hold a higher value in comparison with adults who know to read and write.
To begin
Linking Words
with, education is a process that requires years of training and practice to wield it as a useful tool. I believe that governments should spend abundantly in their educational sector
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
so that they can mould a better and productive generation for the future. For ,instance it is easier to make a high school graduate
in to
Join the words
into
show examples
a doctor or an engineer compared to a grown-up, who does not know to read and write.
Hence
Linking Words
it will be a better and smart choice to concentrate more on our off-springs. Nowadays, in many countries receiving quality tuition is an expensive choice. In
such
Linking Words
places, to study in a better school means higher tuition fees and expenses as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
most of them are privately funded institutions. If the governing authorities can provide the same standards of schooling, it will help create a sense of fairness in the society by, giving a chance to everyone, including the financially backward communities. In conclusion, even though it is important to implement the plans for literacy among the older lot, priority should be given to our growing children as
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
they are a nation's chance for a brighter future.
Submitted by minuderik2411 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: