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Some people think that individuals are becoming more dependent on each other in modern society, while others believe that individuals are becoming more independent of each other. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #individuals #society
Few
people
 believe that individuals are becoming more
reliance
Replace the word
reliant
show examples
 on each other.
This
 is because, the
economy
 is not
self sustaining
Add a hyphen
self-sustaining
show examples
 at
this
 period of time to live an
indepentdent
Correct your spelling
independent
 life, thereby making persons rely on each other for
support
.
This
support
 could be financially, emotionally etc.
For instance
,
an
Change preposition
in an
show examples
economy
 where the cost of living is high because of the inflation in prices, the standard of living of many human beings reduces
therefore
, persons who earn more and can help with excess
they
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
have
support
Fix the infinitive
to support
show examples
others
 at
this
 time.
Also
,
upbringing
Correct article usage
the upbringing
show examples
 of
people
 can
also
 result
into
Change preposition
in
show examples
 being dependent on
others
 in
such
 a way that when one is brought to understand that
responsiblities
Correct your spelling
responsibilities
 are to be taken cared of by
others
, relying on
others
 will become rampant in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
society.
On the other hand
,
others
 believe that
individulas
Correct your spelling
individuals
 are becoming more on their own compare to relying on someone else for
support
 reason been that, some
people
 believe that being independent gives a sense of responsibility, which means
been
Change the form of the verb
being
show examples
 able to take up challenges on their own with no aid of
support
.
This
 can be
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
as
Correct your spelling
a
show examples
result
Add an article
a result
show examples
 of living in a
communtiy
Correct your spelling
community
 where the
economy
 is
self sustaining
Add a hyphen
self-sustaining
show examples
.
Also
, it can sometimes be
as a result
 of upbringing where
people
 have been taught how to take up challenges on their own.
For example
, a
finiancially
Correct your spelling
financially
financial
 self-supporting person who finds
his
Correct pronoun usage
himself
show examples
 or herself in an
economy
that is
 not
sustainble
Correct your spelling
sustainable
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 will increase his or her sources of income,
insteading
Correct your spelling
instead
 of searching
of
Change preposition
for
show examples
 any aid
of
Correct your spelling
or
show examples
support
 from
others
. I am of the opinion that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 individuals are becoming more self-supporting in my society because
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 most
people
 have increased their sources of income
also
 have a renewed mindset of taking up challenges that come their way. To conclude, It is of great essence to be self-relying in
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
society compare to been dependent on
others
 for
support
.
Submitted by Mariam Abdul  on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • interconnectedness
  • globalization
  • digital communication platforms
  • mutual dependency
  • economic globalization
  • international supply chains
  • social validation
  • advancements in technology
  • individualism
  • technological tools
  • smartphones
  • personal computers
  • cultural shift
  • self-sufficiency
  • individualistic attitudes
  • personal achievement
  • self-care
  • interdependency
  • societal structures
  • emotional support
  • underlying foundations
  • human interaction
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