IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8.5

There is an increasing amount of advertising directed at children which encourages them to buy goods such as toys and snacks. Many parents are worried that these advertisements put too much pressure on children, while some advertisers claim that they provide useful information to children. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#amount #children #goods #toys #snacks #parents #advertisements #pressure #advertisers #information
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There are conflicting views regarding whether the advertisement should be exposed to
children
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.
Although
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 these
advertisements
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 make
children
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 aware of some important aspects, I believe that these
adverts
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 are developing the materialistic wants in pupils. Proponents contend that
children
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 are considered vulnerable by the promotional companies as they target them while advertising their products, and they got easily swayed away by the misleading
adverts
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.
As a result
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, they pester their parents to buy them those goods, which makes them a part of the throwaway society.
For example
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, Chocos, a cereal selling company, was able to increase its turnover only by telecasting attractive
advertisements
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 on kids channels like Disney, Hungama after facing huge losses in 2015.
Therefore
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,
advertisements
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 aimed at
children
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 should not be encouraged as they are making them materialistic.
However
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, people in favour of
advertisements
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 argue that they help to increase the
children
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's awareness about different topics and through the medium of educational
adverts
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, they can learn something new.
For instance
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, Amul advertised its milk on television by linking its company with India's rich heritage, and
this
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 advert received a huge appreciation from parents and the society as it portrayed their country's culture as a way of promoting their product.
Moreover
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, there are some
adverts
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also
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, which help pupils to inculcate good habits in themselves like the advert of Colgate company, which motivates
children
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 to brush their teeth twice a day. To conclude, in my opinion,
adverts
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 do more harm to the
children
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 than good by manipulating them to buy their goods, and those should be banned by the government.
Submitted by mingxin.li on

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