IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5.5

Some parents send their children to preschool when they are three or four years old. Other parents wait until their children are old enough for primary school before they send them to school. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of sending children to preschool at a young age.

#parents #children #three #four #years #school #age
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Education
 is considered to be an important element of human life.
Therefore
, some parents think that early
education
 at preschool at 3 or 4 years old is a good idea, while others do not agree with it and send their children to primary
school
 when they become older. In
this
 ,essay we will watch the positive and negative sides of studying young
kids
 in preschool. On the one hand, sending
kids
 at three or four years old to preschool indeed is useful for them.
First
 of all, there are
kids
could
Correct pronoun usage
who could
show examples
 receive the necessary skills and knowledge which will help them adapt in primary
school
. If to give a clear example, when children will come to
school
 they will have needful social skills and know-how they should behave themselves. Secondary, early studying positively influences memory. According to the official statistics, students who visited the preschools do not have problems with learning languages and dates. So, preschools can be beneficial. On other hand, we can see disadvantages of sending
kids
 to preschools at an early age. The
first
 minus is that it is not awareness learning.
For instance
, it is really hard to motivate the child to study, because he does not understand the
importanc
Correct your spelling
importance
important
 of
education
. The
second
 minus, probably when we send young
kids
 to preschool they still their childhood
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 because at
this
 age most
kids
 want to play and travel.
Thus
, some parents wait and send primary
school
. In conclusion, it is true that
education
 has a significant place in our life, so parents are so serious about
this
 question. Someone wants to prepare the kid and send him to preschool
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
 when another's child goes to
school
 at 6. How we have already seen early studying of young children has as
Correct quantifier usage
many
show examples
pluses as minuses.
Submitted by Dana on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: