In many countries there are people with an extremely high income. some people say this is good for the country, while others claim that governments should limit salaries.

Nowadays, anybody can be
inrich
Correct your spelling
enrich
in rich
depending on their abilities. There are many
people
who gain high income in the developed countries. So some of them say that it is necessary for their nation to give the, a large number of
money
, whereas, they are ought to administrate by the government.
To begin
with, those who have enough storage, tend to spend buying expensive productions
such
as a high level of
car
Correct your spelling
care
show examples
and the watch which is good and elegant. As they consume
large
Change the article
a large
show examples
amount of cost, it would connect the circle of the economy in their region.
Furthermore
, the capitalism brings about the competition which
stimulate
Change the verb form
stimulates
show examples
their motivation,
therefore
, they would struggle to improve their talents and career.
Consequently
, that would arise the big
successful
Replace the word
success
show examples
in the future.
On the other hand
. others require equally well-being to the government.
For instance
,
limitting
Correct your spelling
limiting
salaries which give to wealth
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
can collect the stage of public service
such
as medical services. Not only cure systems, but
also
enable to set the insurance for
people
who are jobless, and the authority is able to understand how many
people
are
surffering
Correct your spelling
suffering
from unemployment and hard quality of lives by treating them.
Moreover
, setting
high
Add an article
a high
show examples
average of
money
for
rich
Correct article usage
the rich
show examples
that
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
ignites the barrier between
wealth
Replace the word
wealthy
show examples
and poor. In
adtion
Correct your spelling
addition
, it
also
cause
Change the verb form
causes
show examples
less motivated that
people
who have lower
money
for their work. From these factors, I support the former idea because encouraging workers who have great abilities and high motivation is needs for
developping
Correct your spelling
developing
their economy by they spend much
money
to
Change preposition
on
show examples
stuff and investments. And
then
gaining income can use for their public services without limited income by the
govenmrnt
Correct your spelling
government
.
Submitted by ryoutafukamachi on

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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