It is expected that there will be a higher proportion of older people than that of young people in many countries in the future? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#proportion #people #countries #future #development

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It is inevitable that the ratio of ageing personals is the most vital problem in some countries. Some experts opine that in some nations the proportion of older to young

people

Use synonyms

will be a rise in approaching years. I believe that

this

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scenario will be creating pessimistic developments in the individual country. Those negative points will be explained

further

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in my ensuing paragraph.

Firstly

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, the worst negative effect will be seen that the spending on

health

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and infrastructure for ageing

people

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. As the ratio of older public increases, the financial burden of making and provide a facility and task force related to

health

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also

Linking Words

increased to the government.

For example

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, the Japanese authorities are facing the same problems and as a

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

result

Add a comma

,result

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they have to allot a specific amount of money behind their

health

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facility and front-line workers. To add to

this

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, getting a good treatment and facility is voters basic write and

also

Linking Words

in many ,

countries

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,countries

show examples

the treatment costs are zero or negligible for retired

people

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Hence

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, the municipality has to pay from their budget.

Secondly

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, another main drawback will be having more aged

people

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is the waste of young and dynamic talents in the country. Due to

this

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, the GDP can

also

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be affected.

Moreover

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, in the technological sector, the developments would be slow down due to aged

people

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as they having a very orthodox mindset and not having a tendency to adapt to future technology.

This

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reason is enough to consider one nation as weaker and they are unable to represent their domination at the global level. To summarise from the above discussion, it can be said that having a higher ratio of the aged population can having detrimental progress to the nation as

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it can increase the burden to the government for development in

health

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infrastructure.

Also

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, the GDP and technological development decrease as the taxpayers are minimized.

Submitted by shahparth163 on Sun Aug 08 2021

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

7.5

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

314 words

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It is expected that there will be a higher proportion of older people than that of young people in many countries in the future? Do you think it is a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Environmental problems should be solved by the government instead of individuals and private companies. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

In some countries, owning a home rather than renting one is very important for people. Why might this be the case? Do you think this is positive or negative situation?

Some people think government should ban dangerous sports, such as sky diving and rock climbing. Do you agree or disagree?