IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

Some people think that the best way to reduce crime is to give longer prison sentences. Others, however, believe there are better alternative ways of reducing crime. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #crime #prison #sentences #alternative
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Some
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
belive
Correct your spelling
believe
show examples
 give prisoning
longer
Correct article usage
a longer
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 can diminish
Use synonyms
crime
Correct article usage
the crime
show examples
rate
Use synonyms
.Other, folks
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
 there are more ways to decrease
Use synonyms
crime
Add an article
the crime
show examples
rate
Use synonyms
.
Personally
Add a comma
,Personally
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 assume
Linking Words
second
Change the article
the second
show examples
 position is better
this
Linking Words
 essay will discuss both views.
Majority
Correct article usage
The majority
show examples
 of people prefer long term lockup
than
Change preposition
to
show examples
 looking up other options.Its
undoubtably
Correct your spelling
undoubtedly
crime
Use synonyms
 makers can do it again what he or she did it before.
Therefore
Linking Words
 public
afraid
Add a missing verb
was afraid
show examples
thus
Linking Words
 people and wanted to get rid of society for
longer
Add an article
a longer
show examples
time
Use synonyms
.
Linking Words
Furthermore
Add a comma
,Furthermore
show examples
 masses
thinks
Change the verb form
think
show examples
 giving long
time
Use synonyms
,
prisoner
Add an article
the prisoner
a prisoner
show examples
 will think about his mistakes.
For example
Linking Words
 several prisoners after
in
Add a missing verb
being in
show examples
 jail,
starting
Add the particle
tostarting
show examples
 develop their behaviours
mind
Fix the agreement mistake
minds
show examples
.
Thus
Linking Words
 people successfully back to society and lived their lives.
However
Linking Words
, giving
long
Change the article
a long
show examples
time
Use synonyms
 for all crimes give us some trouble
such
Linking Words
 as do violations again.
For instance
Linking Words
 past century just stealing suits gives 10 years to jail.
In
Change preposition
At
show examples
 that
time
Use synonyms
statiscally
Correct your spelling
statistically
statically
crime
Use synonyms
 was
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
higher
Correct article usage
a higher
show examples
rate
Use synonyms
because
Add the preposition
ofbecause
show examples
 prisoners .
Besides
Linking Words
 jailing them more
Linking Words
instead
Add the preposition
ofinstead
show examples
 work on prisoners talk with psychologists to change their views.
Moreover
Linking Words
 to reduce after
crime
Use synonyms
 needs to improve living conditions.After the release give to
time
Use synonyms
 job options and motivations
therefore
Linking Words
criminal
Fix the agreement mistake
criminals
show examples
 changed
to
Change preposition
into
show examples
worthy
Add an article
the worthy
a worthy
show examples
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
show examples
.To exemplify countries of Norway
wich
Correct your spelling
which
show examples
 have lowest
crime
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
 in the world. In conclusion, society needs to
undestand
Correct your spelling
understand
 criminals are
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
humans and can make mistakes.For
me
Add a comma
,me
show examples
i
Change the capitalization
I
show examples
 think
alternative
Correct article usage
an alternative
show examples
 option
to
Add a missing verb
is to
show examples
 save and give them new life.In
long
Correct article usage
the long
show examples
term
Add a comma
,term
show examples
crime
Use synonyms
rate
Use synonyms
 will drop and the world will become a safer place to live.
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Use a variety of complex and simple sentences

You should use complex sentences in your writing, but it does not mean that you should try to make all of our sentences complex.

‘Complex’ sentences are not actually very complex; they are just two or more simple sentences put together. Putting them together makes the essay more coherent and cohesive.

Examples:

I really want to study but I’m too tired.

I wore a warm coat because the weather was cold.

If action is not taken soon on climate change, global warming will get worse.

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