Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmers (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children).

#people #community #service #part #school #programmers #charity #neighbourhood #sports #children

It is commonly argued that volunteer community service is supposed to be an important part of high school curriculums. I entirely agree with

this

point of view, as I believe that it can increase the chances of applying for jobs and improve

students

’ soft

skills

First

of all, nowadays many organisations look for

charity

experiences which

students

have done apart from studying. The experiences can increase opportunities in applying for jobs or universities.

This

is because it can represent

students

’ behaviours.

For instance

, a qualification that the organisations required,

students

must have done any extracurricular life

such

as volunteer action, because it can

relates

Change the verb form

relate

show examples

to their careers. These experiences enable them to better understand people’s lives in society.

Although

it is not necessary for every organisation, it can upgrade

pupil'

Fix the agreement mistake

pupils'

show examples

profiles.

Furthermore

, working for a

charity

can develop soft

skills

, due to the fact that

students

get hard

skills

from studying in classes but doing volunteer work allows them to acquire many soft

skills

For instance

, before improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children,

undergraduate

Fix the agreement mistake

undergraduates

show examples

have to make a plan or discuss it with people in a rural area. So in these ,

activities

Add a comma

,activities

show examples

they can get decision making, communication and critical thinking

skills

. If there are no

charity

activities, they might have no chance to get

these dexterity

Change the determiner

this dexterity

show examples

. All in all,

students

acquire several advantages from

charity

work

such

as increasing their chances of applying for jobs and developing their soft

skills

. In my opinion, unpaid community service is essential and should be added to the schools’ programs.

Submitted by p.n.fongnam on Thu Aug 12 2021

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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

Summary
Restatement of thesis
Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

In conclusion
To conclude
To summarize
Finally
In a nutshell
In general

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

260 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people believe that unpaid community service should be a compulsory part of high school programmers (for example working for a charity, improving the neighbourhood or teaching sports to younger children).

Include an introduction and conclusion

Many people think that students should be allowed to choose the subject that they study in school, whereas others feel that they should choose the curriculum. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that music is a good way of bringing people of different cultures and ages together. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animals. Is it justified or there is any alternative? To what extent do you agree or diagree?

Parents and teachers make many rules for children to encourage good behaviour and to protect them from danger. However, children would benefit from fewer rules and greater freedom. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that modern games do not develop skill in children.However traditional games developed skills in childhood.To what extent do you agree or disagree.