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Band 5

Some people believe that nowadays we have too many choices. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#people #choices
It is often argued that we have a lot of
way
Change to a plural noun
ways
show examples
 to select something more than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past. I totally agree with
this
 opinion because these
day
Fix the agreement mistake
days
show examples
people
 can use more efficient in
technology
 and they have more
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
 in their job. The main reason why I believe
people
 have lots of choices is
because
Replace the word
that
show examples
 nowadays it has
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
modern
technology
that is
 useful and convenient.
Technology
is extremely aid
Change the verb form
is extremely aiding
show examples
people
 to find any information that they want to know about. To illustrate, we use the Google to search data and solve the problem that
happen
Change the verb form
happens
show examples
 in our life, and the Google has several websites that we can choose any blogs that you love
also
 there is a lot of option to lead you to the best
decided
Replace the word
decision
show examples
. Another reason why I support the notion that
opportunity
 in occupation is much more
magnify
Change the form of the verb
magnified
show examples
 than
the
Change preposition
in the
show examples
 past
because
Add a missing verb
is because
show examples
business
 economics are progressing
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
every year that can lead
lots
Change preposition
to lots
show examples
 of investment in the
business
 company.
This
 is why many companies have to announce to find new employees and
this
 is lead to increase the
opportunity
 for
people
 to pick their job and company which is satisfied.
For instance
, in recent
year
Fix the agreement mistake
years
show examples
, The UK
business
 showed
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
rapid growth.
This
 event effect lots of cooperation in the UK to search
more
Change preposition
for more
show examples
worker
Fix the agreement mistake
workers
show examples
. In conclusion, I completely agree that
people
 can pick several choices that they wanted.
This
 is because
advance
Fix the agreement mistake
advances
show examples
 in
technology
 to find their information and the development of
economy
Replace the word
economic
show examples
business
 make almost population have more
opportunity
Fix the agreement mistake
opportunities
show examples
 to choose their career and work company.
Submitted by Marker & Kaohom on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • overwhelmed
  • decision fatigue
  • paralysis by analysis
  • consumerism
  • globalization
  • personal autonomy
  • market saturation
  • option overload
  • decision-making process
  • psychological well-being
  • buyer's remorse
  • customization
  • trade-offs
  • minimalism
  • information superhighway
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