Topic 21: It is better for children to grow up in the countryside than in a big city. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to develop your essay.

Some people think
children
should grow up in the
countryside
because
children
can enjoy a memorable childhood in the
countryside
that
big
Correct article usage
a big
show examples
city
cannot provide.
However
, I prefer to choose
children
should grow up in a big
city
. A big
city
will take
children
too many important things , rather than
children
just have fun in the
countryside
.
First
of all , I think the best important point is education. As well known, if a child
want
Change the verb form
wants
show examples
to get a good
education
Replace the word
educational
show examples
resource,it is very important to take education in a big
city
. Big cities always have
high quality
Add a hyphen
high-quality
show examples
teachers , various famous schools for
children
to choose
and
Change preposition
from and
show examples
good
Correct article usage
a good
show examples
study
enviornment
Correct your spelling
environment
.
Secondly
,
countryside
Correct article usage
the countryside
show examples
may not only haven't enough
number of
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
hospitals
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
but
also
there's
quality
Add an article
the quality
show examples
of doctors are lower than
city's
Change the noun form
cities
city
show examples
. Obviously , many
children
get sickness always be taken to
city
's hospital due to country's
hosptial
Correct your spelling
hospital
can't handle it. In fact , some people will disagree with my opinion because they think
child's
Correct article usage
a child's
show examples
serious commission is having a good time in their childhood rather than study hard. To be honesty, modern family's
children
always follow high
competitive
Replace the word
competition
show examples
after they
borned
Correct your spelling
burned
. If you never impose
your
Change preposition
on your
show examples
children
some pressure,your child may become the only
one
Correct quantifier usage
apply
show examples
loser in a remarkable group of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
lots of
children
. To conclude,
children
who grow up in the
city
will definitely be accompanied by a lot of drawbacks.
However
, they can gain
more
Add an article
a more
show examples
important resource that
countryside
don't have. If you want to you
children
can get more opportunity to become a successful person,
big
Add an article
the big
a big
show examples
city
is the Irreplaceable choice.
Submitted by fox04157 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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