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Band 4

Some people believe that technology has led to many positive developments in their lives, while others think technology is gradually taking over control of the way people live. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

#people #technology #developments #lives #control
In the
last
 decade, technology development has
accelatrated
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accelerated
 dramatically.
As a result
, lifestyle has been changed. Some people believe that technology changed our
Correct your spelling
lives
life
lifes
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lives
show examples
 to be better.
However
, others claim that
such
 developments
gradullay
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gradually
 control our
Correct your spelling
lives
life
lifes
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lives
show examples
. I believe that technological development advantages outweigh the disadvantages. On one hand, the advancement in telecommunications, computers and machines allow the community to function
on
Change preposition
at
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appropriate
Add an article
the appropriate
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 time and
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in
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on
Correct your spelling
an
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organized
Correct article usage
an organized
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 way.
For example
, using computers in companies and hospitals facilitate the
commications
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communications
communication
 between the employees and increased customers satisfaction.
Furthermore
, the advancement in medical technology enhanced the diagnosis and the treatment for various diseases
such
 as cancers and heart problems.
On the other hand
, some people see that
techological
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technological
 devices take control of our life. As a consequence,
public
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the public
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 pays attention to their phones, tablet and personal computer, while they ignore their family relationships.
Thsese
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These
 issues
has
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have
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 been increasing and damaging the community stability.
For instance
, we can see newly married couples and young parents are suffering to focus on
thier
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their
 roles in life as they are
occupaied
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occupied
 with virtual reality
plataforms
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platforms
 like Facebook and
Instigram
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Instagram
. In conclusion, Technological advancement provides our society with
normous
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enormous
 advantages
such
 as computers, medical devices and telecommunication
plataforms
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platforms
. Despite that, our society
suffer
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suffers
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 from side effects from
such
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apply
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innovations
such
 as divorce rate and poor parenting style. I believe that the advantages of machinery development
compansate
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compensate
compensates
the
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for the
show examples
 disadvantages.
Submitted by a.rashaeideh on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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