Public celebrations (such as national days, festivals etc) are held in most countries. These are often quite expensive, and some people say that governments should spend money on more useful things. Do you agree or disagree?

#celebrations #festivals #countries #people #governments #money

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Many states often spend a large amount of

money

Use synonyms

Change preposition

show examples

public celebrations. Some

people

Use synonyms

think

this

Linking Words

is too expensive and the

authorties

Correct your spelling

authorities

could

apply

Add the preposition

forapply

show examples

these

Change the determiner

this money

show examples

money

Use synonyms

in more useful fields. In my opinion, I agree with it, because

this

Linking Words

is a type of waste and the funding could be used to improve peoples' life quality. The celebrations of the public is a way of waste. In order to prepare these activities, normally, the governments will

recruite

Correct your spelling

recruit

recruits

a lot of workers and

manufacturies

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manufactures

show examples

to produce the materials that they need.

This

Linking Words

is a big amount of

money

Use synonyms

that is

Linking Words

actually from peoples' pocket——tax.

For example

Linking Words

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show examples

Chinese national day, the government requests all cities

hanging

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to hang

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on the new national flag on the street and arrange fireworks or light

performance

Fix the agreement mistake

performances

show examples

in the evening. It is hard to count how much they invest in

this

Linking Words

celebration.

Correct your spelling

Someone

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Some one

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Someone

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might argue that

this

Linking Words

is a wise way to stimulate the country's economy because many orders are sent

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apply

show examples

to factories.

However

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, if the government share

this

Linking Words

money

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with

show examples

every

citizens

Change to a singular noun

citizen

show examples

people

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can use the

money

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to buy the things that they really want, and

this

Linking Words

will

also

Linking Words

boost the economy. For a country, there are many other places

need

Correct pronoun usage

that need

show examples

to be invested

that is

Linking Words

improtant

Correct your spelling

important

than a celebration. Health, education, and nursing senior

people

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are really significant to all society, but there is no many countries

can

Correct pronoun usage

that can

show examples

totally solve these problems around the world. Even in the developed countries,

Correct your spelling

nobody

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no body

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nobody

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can state that all their children can access

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

high quality

Add a hyphen

high-quality

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education, and their health system is able to serve their

people

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which is free and fast.

For example

Linking Words

, in the UK, many

communties'

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communities

children cannot learn in a good school, and NHS can serve the public

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for

show examples

free but the queue is quite long sometimes. To conclude, many countries celebrate a certain

anniversity

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anniversary

which costs a lot of

money

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This

Linking Words

essay agrees with the point that it is really expensive and the

the

Remove the redundancy

apply

show examples

government should use

these wealth

Change the determiner

this wealth

show examples

in some other places

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apply

show examples

because

this

Linking Words

is a terrible form of waste and social welfare actually more need investment than

such

Linking Words

celebrations do.

Submitted by 2587729786 on Wed Aug 18 2021

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
27
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 8.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

360 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

fostering
national pride
unity
cultural heritage
sense of belonging
boost the local economy
hospitality and retail sectors
showcase
global audience
foreign relations
multifaceted
allocating
quality of life
social inclusion
cohesive and inclusive society

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Public celebrations (such as national days, festivals etc) are held in most countries. These are often quite expensive, and some people say that governments should spend money on more useful things. Do you agree or disagree?

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Nowadays some professionals such as doctors, lawyers and engineers are paid much higher than ordinary workers. What do you think of this trend? Are there any jobs which you think should offer higher salaries?

Some people say that now is the best time in history to be living. What is your opinion about this? What other time in history would be interesting to live in?

Describe some of the problems overreliance on cars can cause and suggest a possible solution.

the money spent by goverenment on space programmes would e better spent on vitl public services such asschool and hospitals.To what extend do you agree or disagree.

Human activities have led negative effects on plant and animals all over the world. Some people think it is too late to do something about it. Others think there is still some time to take actions. Discuss both views and give your opinion.