Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

#women #childcare #men #focus #children #life

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Nowadays, It is frequently argued that

women

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are more suitable for childcare than men as a consequence that they should take care of

children

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instead

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of working. In

this

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essay, I will explain the reason why I strongly disagree with the statement.

Firstly

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, I think that in modern society there are

any

Correct quantifier usage

show examples

differences between

male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

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and female

thank

Fix the agreement mistake

thanks

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to the

developpement

Correct your spelling

development

human

Add an article

the human

show examples

mind,

infact

Correct your spelling

in fact

, in the past,

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

people used to think that there were differences from

women

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to men because the man could be considered a higher level and for

Linking Words

this

Add a comma

,this

show examples

he had to

work

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for his family and

this

Linking Words

situation was provided

also

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from the government with unbelievable laws. Nowadays,

luckliy

Correct your spelling

luckily

this

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difference is deleted and both sexes have the same role in society and for

this

Linking Words

reason

Add a comma

,reason

show examples

I think that

women

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can

work

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instead

Linking Words

take

Change the verb form

taking

show examples

care of

children

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because they can be

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

successful

workers

Correct the article-noun agreement

worker

show examples

and not only a great mother which is,

also

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, in my opinion, one of the most difficult jobs in the contemporary World.

In addition

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, I believe that

also

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a father can focus on raising younger due to the fact that the mother could

work

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more hours than him and for

this

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reason he will spend several time with their

children

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and

this

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can be considered as a normal routine. In conclusion, I think that there are no more differences between males and females and if the

women

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would like to

work

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they have to do it,

although

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some people believe that they are more suitable for

rising

Correct your spelling

raising

show examples

children

Use synonyms

Submitted by edogiova01 on Thu Aug 19 2021

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

6
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
14
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

6 paragraphs

258 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

gender roles
nurturing
empathy
sensitivity
maternal instinct
paternal involvement
child's development
work-life balance
gender equality

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Women are better at childcare than men therefore they should focus more on raising children and less on their working life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Fully explain your ideas

Some people regard eating meat as completely wrong. To what extent do you agree?

Many foods are shipped from far away. Some people think that eating local food is more environmentally and economically. Do you think the advantages outweigh its disadvantages?

Some people say that the main environmental Problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there are more impotent environmental problems. Discuss both these views and give your own opinian.

The advantages of the spread of English as a global language will continue to outweigh its disadvantages. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

When we meet someone for the first time, we generally decide very quickly what kind of person we think they are and if we like them or not. Is this a good thing or a bad thing?