Students tend to choose a part-time job to earn money during the University students’ life, so they cannot balance between the work and study. How could this issue affect the future generation and what are the solutions to have a better life on the university study level?

Nowadays,
undergraduate
Fix the agreement mistake
undergraduates
show examples
have the tendency to work in a part-time position for earning money during the studying
process
in the academy. Many people believe that it can bring negative effects on the unbalancing between the study and work.
This
essay aims to discuss the consequences that
students
can take if they cannot balance both of these and give some solutions to cope with its problems. The bad performance is the element that can be caused
firstly
in
this
circumstance. The unbalancing between work and study means that they cannot focus perfectly on their businesses. As the result, less performance in their job is inevitable and it will harm their career path.
Nevertheless
, the bad outcome is
also
a consequence that these
students
have to face if
this
situation persists.
In addition
, the unbalancing between studying and working
process
also
takes their health into consideration in the unexpected consequence. These
students
can be meet with the problem of overload if they try to do both well while their ability is limited.
This
concern makes them neglected themselves and brings the feeling of overwhelming. It can lead to their mental break out
that is
not rare to see in society nowadays, especially with university
students
. In conclusion, the lack of professional managing and balancing in the working and studying
process
can cause numerous consequences in both performance and health.
However
, it is undeniable the benefit of a part-time job during the university student’s life. It can bring money as well as practice when
undergraduate
Fix the agreement mistake
undergraduates
show examples
apply
Change the verb form
applies
show examples
the knowledge that they learn in
academy
Add an article
the academy
show examples
to reality. The government and university have the responsibility in
this
situation to restrict some affordable policies to limit the working time as well as the education system. That not only have
students
can take advantage of working, but it
also
helps reduce distraction during the studying
process
.
Submitted by duyanhoppa1706 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: