Some people think that parents have a great influence on their children. Others believe that the media is a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

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In the modern era, children are not only learning things from their families
,
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apply

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but
also
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from Broadcasting
media
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

. There is a high influence on the
child
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child's

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behaviour in both ways. Most people think that
parents
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can mould their
child
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child's

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aspects in a good manner.
And some
Correct word choice
Some

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people claim that
kid's
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kids'

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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attitude
Fix the agreement mistake
attitudes

It seems that attitude may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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is
Wrong verb form
are influenced

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb is. Consider changing it.

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by the influence of social
media
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.I will be illustrating the two views
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in

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the below paragraphs.
Firstly
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, Nowadays kids are very smart and they always love to spend their time watching TV. As they are attracted towards the television, they think that what the
media
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

shows is correct.
This
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will have a huge effect on the toddlers.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, In
United
Correct article usage
the United

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States
Add a comma
States,

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase In United States. Consider adding a comma.

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there
is
Unnecessary verb
apply

The verb is appears to be unnecessary here.

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are kids who always
see
Verb problem
watch

There may be a verb use issue here.

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Telephone
Correct article usage
the Telephone

It seems that there is an article usage problem here.

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, Television
Correct your spelling
and television

The words , Television seem to be misspelled. Consider replacing them.

. Observed several things like foul language and talking in school.
As he
Correct word choice
He

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thought
that
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is
Wrong verb form
was

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb is. Consider changing it.

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the right way to behave.
Secondly
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the impact of
parents
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

on
child's
Correct article usage
a child's

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activity is more
due to
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Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

they see their mother from
the
Correct article usage
a

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small age and most of the things they will learn from them.
For instance
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

,
In
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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a recent survey
studied
Verb problem
found

There may be a verb use issue here.

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that successful professionals are close to their
parents
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

.
This
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is because they inherently learn moral values, smooth behaviour and respect towards the elderly. They learnt the important lessons to build their career in the most effective way. In conclusion, Admitting that the negative impact
is from
Verb problem
of

There may be a verb use issue here.

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the
media
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It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

,
which
Correct pronoun usage
apply

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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can
eradicate
Wrong verb form
be eradicated

It appears that your sentence or clause uses an incorrect form of the verb eradicate. Consider changing it.

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by the
parent's
Change noun form
parents'

It seems that this noun form may be incorrect.

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teachings. So I consider the influence of the
parents
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is only high when compared with others. As they observe and understand the great learnings from family.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea and link them logically to create a cohesive argument. Use topic sentences to introduce each main point clearly.
task response
The introduction and conclusion are present, but could be further developed. Make sure to clearly address all parts of the task prompt and provide a thorough conclusion that summarizes your main points.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • role models
  • mimic behavior
  • worldviews
  • moral frameworks
  • exposure
  • social interactions
  • educational pursuits
  • social skills
  • emotional intelligence
  • pervasive influence
  • digital technology
  • perceptions
  • attitudes
  • behaviors
  • information dissemination
  • diverse perspectives
  • cultures
  • broader understanding
  • peer influence
  • trends
  • social media platforms
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