Some people think that parents have a great influence on their children. Others believe that the media is a bigger influence. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.
In the modern era, children are not only learning things from their families the below paragraphs.
,
but Remove the comma
apply
also
from Broadcasting media
. There is a high influence on the child
behaviour in both ways. Most people think that Change noun form
child's
parents
can mould their child
aspects in a good manner. Change noun form
child's
And some
people claim that Correct word choice
Some
kid's
Change noun form
kids'
attitude
Fix the agreement mistake
attitudes
is
by the influence of social Wrong verb form
are influenced
media
.I will be illustrating the two viewsChange preposition
in
Firstly
, Nowadays kids are very smart and they always love to spend their time watching TV. As they are attracted towards the television, they think that what the media
shows is correct. This
will have a huge effect on the toddlers. For example
, In United
Correct article usage
the United
States
there Add a comma
States,
is
are kids who always Unnecessary verb
apply
see
Verb problem
watch
Telephone
Correct article usage
the Telephone
, Television
. Observed several things like foul language and talking in school. Correct your spelling
and television
As he
thought Correct word choice
He
that
is
the right way to behave.
Wrong verb form
was
Secondly
, the impact of parents
on child's
activity is more Correct article usage
a child's
due to
they see their mother from the
small age and most of the things they will learn from them. Correct article usage
a
For instance
, In
a recent survey Change preposition
apply
studied
that successful professionals are close to their Verb problem
found
parents
. This
is because they inherently learn moral values, smooth behaviour and respect towards the elderly. They learnt the important lessons to build their career in the most effective way.
In conclusion, Admitting that the negative impact is from
the Verb problem
of
media
, which
can Correct pronoun usage
apply
eradicate
by the Wrong verb form
be eradicated
parent's
teachings. So I consider the influence of the Change noun form
parents'
parents
is only high when compared with others. As they observe and understand the great learnings from family.Submitted by tassajay93 on
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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph focuses on one main idea and link them logically to create a cohesive argument. Use topic sentences to introduce each main point clearly.
task response
The introduction and conclusion are present, but could be further developed. Make sure to clearly address all parts of the task prompt and provide a thorough conclusion that summarizes your main points.
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