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Writing Samples
Band 5

There are more and more effective security measures in large cities to reduce the crime. For example, installation of anti-crime devices in cities. Does this endeavour bring more benefits than problems?

#security #measures #cities #crime #installation #devices #endeavour
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Crime is increasing at an alarming rate in
Add an article
the metropolis
a metropolis
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metropolis
Fix the agreement mistake
metropolises
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as a result
 a plethora of safety measures have been taken to alleviate the problem.
However
, some people hold the view that installing anti-crime devices can be problematic.
This
 essay tends to discuss both perspectives and I will explain why I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.
To begin
 with, it is an indisputable fact that cameras are a major deterrent to crime. Nowadays, CCTV cameras are installed in almost every buildings
thus
 leaving little or no scope for criminals to invade the house.
Similarly
, burglar alarms have largely contributed
in
Change preposition
to
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 decreasing  the number of thefts and robberies in metropolitan cities. Whenever someone burglarizes, the sound system turn on alerting everyone in the house and the authority.
For instance
, in New York City, the
numbers
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number
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 of cases of burglaries
has
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have
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 declined
deie
Correct your spelling
due
die
 to the prevalence of security devices. Every coin has two sides. The drawbacks of
this
 initiative are just as many as the benefits. The
first
 disadvantage that has often been argued by those against
installation
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the installation
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 of anti-crime gadgets is that it would lead to economic loss. To be more precise, inserting these tools in a society or building would entail
considerable
Correct article usage
a considerable
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 sum of money. And
also
 there is no certainty whether the robbery would take place in that very society or not.
Secondly
, thieves can effortlessly hack into the system and allow themselves in without sounding the alarm. To conclude,
although
 fitting anti-crime gadgets have some disadvantages, they provide people with a safe
surrounding
Fix the agreement mistake
surroundings
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.
Therefore
, I strongly believe that the merits outbalance the demerits.
Submitted by maimunazaman474 on

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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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