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Band 6

: Fossil fuels ( coal, oil, natural gas) are the main sources in many countries, but in some countries, the use of alternative sources of energy( wind energy and solar energy ) is encouraged. To what extent do you think it is a positive or negative development?

#fuels #oil #gas #sources #countries #alternative #energy #wind #development
Today, in a fast-changing world in which people’s demand for a better quality of life has increased, in some developing or underdeveloped countries, the usage of fossil fuels is still common whereas
in
Add the comma(s)
,in
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 developed nations, renewable resources
such
 as wind
energy
 and solar
energy
 are used widely. From my personal perspective, the use of these alternatives is definitely a positive change.
First
 of all, the exploitation of natural and renewable sources of
energy
 has profound impacts on people and the environment. In fact, the exploiting process of many conventional resources leads to an array of problems to public health because
this
 allows harmful gases to be emitted into the air, water and land.
Consequently
, it puts individuals at a higher risk of suffering from fatal health problems.
Moreover
,
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
overexploitation contributes greatly to the imbalance of the ecosystem because it can cause soil erosion and deforestation, which might lead to the loss of accommodation and food for animals.
As a result
, some endangered species would be driven to the verge of extinction.
Second
 of all, the consumption of non-renewable resources is no longer beneficial because it is genuinely a waste of national budgets.
For instance
, the authorities have to allocate a huge amount of money for all parts of exploring and exploiting fossil fuels, which means that other economic sectors
such
 as education, tourism or trading would have to deal with the lack of financial assistance from the government.
Therefore
, cutting spending on traditional sources of
energy
 is an appropriate choice because it helps avoid the imbalance of
economy
Correct article usage
the economy
show examples
 and ensure other fields are equally developed. In brief, I think that the usage of renewable sources of
energy
 is a positive development among countries because it benefits residents,
environment
Correct article usage
the environment
show examples
 or even the government in many remarkable ways and in the future,
this
 might play an active role in improving human’s quality of life.
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Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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