IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

Some people think that instead of preventing climate change, we need to find a way to live with it. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #climate #change
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Some
people
Use synonyms
 believe that we should learn
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
how to live in
the
Correct article usage
an
show examples
 environment
that
Correct determiner usage
the
show examples
climate
Use synonyms
 is changing rather than preventing it.
However
Linking Words
, I totally disagree with
this
Linking Words
 view.
Actually
Add a comma
,Actually
show examples
climate
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
 is caused by humans, so
people
Use synonyms
 have the responsibility to recover it. The increase of carbon dioxide is the reason why
Use synonyms
climate
Add an article
the climate
show examples
 is becoming warmer. On the one hand, the exhaust from vehicles on the road and emissions from factories are the source of carbon dioxide.
On the other hand
Linking Words
,
People
Use synonyms
 cut more and more forests as well as plant
less
Change the quantifier
fewer
show examples
 trees, leading to less carbon dioxide can be absorbed by green plants. The planet is the common home for all creatures not just for humans,
people
Use synonyms
 are supposed to offset mistakes they have made. Many animals cannot survive
such
Linking Words
a
Remove the article
apply
show examples
warm weather and become extinct, so
people
Use synonyms
 should take efforts to save these animals. As
Use synonyms
climate
Add an article
the climate
show examples
 is becoming more extreme, it is difficult to find a way to live in
such
Linking Words
environment
Correct article usage
an environment
show examples
 while it is easier to take measures to prevent it.
First
Linking Words
 of all,
climate
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
 will lead to many serious disasters that humans have no power to prevent. As
Use synonyms
climate
Add an article
the climate
show examples
 becomes warmer, ice packs are melting increasingly, which leads to the rise of water
level
Fix the agreement mistake
levels
show examples
. In
this
Linking Words
 way, flooding is more and more frequent now, and
people
Use synonyms
 lose their homes and family when flooding comes.
Second
Linking Words
, there are many measures
can
Correct pronoun usage
that can
show examples
 be taken to prevent
climate
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
, from governments to individuals. Governments can introduce laws to restrict the number of vehicles and promote “ green taxes” on factories. Individuals can take public transportation
instead
Linking Words
 of driving their own cars. In conclusion, it seems to me that
people
Use synonyms
 should make every effort to prevent
climate
Use synonyms
change
Use synonyms
.
Submitted by 玉心祖 on

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • climate change
  • prevent
  • adaptation
  • mitigation
  • cope with
  • effects
  • shift
  • mindset
  • lifestyle
  • balance
  • invest
  • research
  • technology
  • crucial
  • education
  • awareness
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