Some people think that zoos are all cruel and should be closed down. Others however believe that zoos can be useful in protecting wild animals. Discuss both opinions and give your own opinion

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Keeping wild animals in a
zoo
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is a controversial issue. While there are some
disagree
Correct pronoun usage
who disagree

It seems that there is a pronoun problem here.

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with
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

action, the benefit of having wild
Correct your spelling
life
lives

The word lifes is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

lifes
Correct your spelling
lives

It appears that the noun lifes is misspelled. Correct the spelling.

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in artificial
environmen
Correct your spelling
environment
environments

The word environmen is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

like zoos
also
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

have many positive points.
From
Change the preposition
In

The preposition From may be incorrect. Consider changing it to another preposition.

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my opinion, I completely agree that zoos can
protecting
Change the verb form
protect
be protecting

The verb protecting after the modal verb can does not appear to be in the correct form. Consider changing the verb form.

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wild animals and
advantages
Correct article usage
the advantages

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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of
Use synonyms
Add an article
the zoo
show examples
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

zoo
Fix the agreement mistake
zoos

It seems that zoo may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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is overtaken the drawbacks.
Linking Words
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

However
Add a comma
,However

It appears that you are missing a comma after the introductory phrase However. Consider adding a comma.

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this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

essay will examine both
side
Change to a plural noun
sides

The singular countable noun side follows the quantifier both, which requires a plural noun. Consider using a plural noun or a different quantifier.

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of
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

issue.
To begin
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

with,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

zoo
Correct article usage
a zoo

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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is a good place for scientists to research and prevent
Add an article
the animal
an animal
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animal
Fix the agreement mistake
animals

It seems that animal may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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from extinction. The reduction in
amount
Add an article
the amount

The noun phrase amount seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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of species is a good example of unprotection.
Therefore
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, keeping animal from their freedom
seem
Change the verb form
seems

The verb seem does not seem to agree with the subject. Consider changing the verb form.

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to be cruel but
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is necessary evil way. Another benefit is
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

zoo
Fix the agreement mistake
zoos

It seems that zoo may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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inspiring many children. Not like seeing in the book, If children can learn from real experience with
animal
Add an article
an animal

The noun phrase animal seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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such
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

as
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour

The spelling of behavior is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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, smell, sound and etc., the importance of the other
Correct your spelling
lives
lifes
Correct your spelling
lives

It appears that the noun lifes is misspelled. Correct the spelling.

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could be
awared
Correct your spelling
awarded
aware

The word awared is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

. Moving to the fact that
zoo
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

is not proper
for ever
Correct your spelling
forever

The word for ever seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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animals.
For example
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, the carnivores like Lion and
tiger
Fix the agreement mistake
tigers

It seems that tiger may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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have
Correct article usage
the instincts
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instincts
Fix the agreement mistake
instinct

It seems that instincts may not agree in number with other words in this phrase.

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to run and hunt and
as a result
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

of
peting
Correct your spelling
putting
petting

The word peting is not in our dictionary. If you’re sure this spelling is correct, you can add it to your personal dictionary to prevent future alerts.

them in a small cage, aggressive
behavior
Change the spelling
behaviour

The spelling of behavior is a non-British variant. For consistency, consider replacing it with the British English spelling.

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is unavoidable. To conclude,
Use synonyms
Use synonyms

It is important to use synonyms in your writing, as you will lose marks if you repeat words from the question and use the same words in your essay over and over. If you do that, it will show the examiner that you have a limited vocabulary and you want to do the opposite for a high band score.

zoo
Add an article
the zoo
a zoo

The noun phrase zoo seems to be missing a determiner before it. Consider adding an article.

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can be
the
Correct article usage
a

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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place to protect
Correct your spelling
wildlife
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wild life
Correct your spelling
wildlife

The word wild life seems to be miswritten. Consider replacing it.

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.
However
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, stress from
limited
Correct article usage
a limited

It seems that article use may be incorrect here.

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area to
live
Replace the word
life

The word live doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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Change preposition
in is

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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is consider
Change the verb form
is considered

It appears that the form of the verb consider does not work with is in this sentence.

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as
Change preposition
apply

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

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a drawback. The better way to deal with
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

is that zoos must design to have enough space proper
Correct your spelling
for
show examples
fro
Correct your spelling
for

The word fro doesn’t seem to fit this context. Consider replacing it with a different one.

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each species.

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Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • animal welfare
  • conservation
  • captive breeding
  • habitat
  • ethical issues
  • zoochosis
  • endangered species
  • genetic diversity
  • reintroduction programs
  • wildlife education
  • sanctuary
  • natural living conditions
  • artificial environments
  • behavioral enrichment
  • ecosystem
What to do next:
Look at other essays: