IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people think employers should not care about the way their employees dress, but the quality of work. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #employers #care #employees #dress #quality #work
Many people believe that employees absolutely dress what they think is comfortable for them without judgment, but how effective they
work
. In my perspective, I suppose that both of them
also
 play a fundamental role in minimum standards at the
work
 office. On the one hand, what they solve
this
 problem at
work
 and what they do to take benefits for their company which is proved for controllers. When you
work
 at some specific occupations, if they want to keep these jobs they will have the ability to receive it and be totally reasonable for it. With fantastic performance which is attributed to the fact that not only you deserve higher profit, but
also
 gain highly expectations from their employers or bosses.
For example
, in
Vietnam
 airlines which is one of the biggest airlines in
Vietnam
, at the end of every month, they
also
 celebrate people who have some achievements,
however
, they absolutely punish people who make mistakes.
On the other hand
, dressing the uniform in the company creates a professional
environment
. For the most part, the working
environment
 is extremely crucial for the effectiveness of
work
. When employees
work
 in huge companies, they
also
 allow the rule that they have to dress in the same clothes which lead to equality between every employee, which will make employers just focus on their performance with judgement about clothes.
For instance
, in
Vietnam
airline
Fix the agreement mistake
Airlines
show examples
, the company’s purpose is to create a unification that radically makes a professional
environment
 and any persons in
Vietnam
 airlines will become their symbol. In conclusion,
although
 performance at
work
 office is sharply important, dressing same uniform will bring some positive aspects that are relevant with creating a private
environment
 for the company.
Submitted by plt13112001 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: