IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6.5

Government invest in the arts such as music and theatre is a waste of money. Government must invest this money in public services instead. To what extent do you agree with this statement?

#government #arts #music #theatre #waste #money #services
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Now the days'
government
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 invests a lot of funds in public
services
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 and I don't think it is a waste of wealth in
arts
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 is
also
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 not a bad thing to do. Investing a bulk of
money
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 in only public
services
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 is beneficial for society because many public depend on
this
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 public assistance, but it is not a bad idea to invest
money
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 in
arts
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. There are several reasons for the
government
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 to invest a majority of its
money
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 in public
services
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.
First
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 and foremost public
services
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 are things like hospitals,schools and roads. These are the most important things for the public as a lot of people depend on them. Investing in hospitals helps in increase in discovering new forms of treatment and helps in curing diseases for mankind. Schools are the things which determine the future of the young generation of kids in society, so it is very important for the
government
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 to invest
money
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 in schools and hospitals. As many lower-class families depend on
this
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 public assistance it is very important to invest a bulk of capital in public
services
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. And is
also
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 a good thing to invest some wealth in crafts like music and theatre. As it is hard for institutes for making profits in the form of
arts
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 as these are the major source of entertainment for the community. So it will be beneficial for these institutes if the
government
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 invests some
money
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 in
arts
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 so these institutes can run for a long time by helping society in getting some form of entertainment. To sum up , these are the benefits these public
services
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 and
arts
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 get if the
government
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 invests
money
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 in them. According to ,me it is beneficial for the
government
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 to invest
money
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 in both public
services
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 and the
arts
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. It is ok for the
government
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 to invest the majority of
money
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 in public
services
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 and some
money
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 in
arts
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 for the growth of
arts
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 institutions.
Submitted by divya6112 on

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To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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