Some people regard the video games as harmless fun, or even as a useful educational tool. Others, however, believe that videos games are having an adverse effect on the people who play them. In your opinion, do the drawbacks of video games outweigh the benefits? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

#people #video #games #fun #tool #videos #effect

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?

Present day

Add a hyphen

Present-day

show examples

generation

are

Change the verb form

show examples

influenced by the sedentary lifestyle.

Moreover

Linking Words

pupil

Fix the agreement mistake

pupils

show examples

become addicted to

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

visual

games

Use synonyms

Although

Linking Words

this

Linking Words

has got few merits, the demerits surpass

this

Linking Words

This

Linking Words

essay will examine the topic in detail with relevant examples in the following paragraphs.

To begin

Linking Words

with, the

children

Use synonyms

can be more creative in future, if they enjoy video

games

Use synonyms

in childhood.

For example

Linking Words

, a study conducted by the Rajiv Gandhi University, India, mentioned that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

children

Use synonyms

those

Correct pronoun usage

apply

show examples

who played video

games

Use synonyms

were more creative than the students

Correct your spelling

preferred

preffered

Correct pronoun usage

who preffered

show examples

outdoor

games

Use synonyms

In addition

Linking Words

, nowadays, more parents are encouraging their kids to play television

games

Use synonyms

because of safety concerns. To exemplify, a recent survey

reports

Fix the agreement mistake

report

show examples

from different states of India

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

shows that,

Change preposition

apply

show examples

every year the child missing cases are raising enormously. To summarize, indoor

games

Use synonyms

assures protection to the child.

Moreover

Linking Words

, it

also

Linking Words

helps the kid to become a versatile thinker in future.

On the contrary

Linking Words

, sitting in front of a personal computer for

longer

Add an article

a longer

show examples

period can gift vision problems to the student.

For example

Linking Words

, a study conducted at Global International School, by Punjab University proved that

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

three in every ten

children

Use synonyms

are depends

Change the verb form

are depending

show examples

spectacle

Add an article

a spectacle

show examples

for reading

purpose

Fix the agreement mistake

purposes

show examples

For instance

Linking Words

, obesity is

the

Remove the article

apply

show examples

another major issue.

This

Linking Words

is because of

lack

Correct article usage

a lack

show examples

of physical activities.

In addition

Linking Words

, the worst one is social anxiety due to no social

contacts

Fix the agreement mistake

contact

show examples

. To summarize, the demerits affect the

children

Use synonyms

both physically and emotionally.

Finally

Linking Words

, the student must be allowed to enjoy

the

Correct article usage

show examples

environmentally friendly life. Because

Remove the comma

apply

show examples

it helps him to stay healthy and active. In my opinion,

although

Linking Words

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

indoor

games

Use synonyms

have few pros, the cons outweigh

this

Linking Words

Submitted by divyahemakumar2017 on Thu Sep 09 2021

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
22
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

271 words

🚀 Prepare for IELTS writing section today!

Unlimited Task 1 & Task 2 checks
Practice with essays, charts, and letters.
Personalized suggestions & mistake analysis
Spot every mistake and boost your score.
Topic ideas & vocabulary helpers
Expand your ideas and use the right words.
Progress tracking
Watch your writing improve with every practice.

What to do next:

Look at other essays:

4.5
band
Some people think that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Others think that the true function of a university should beto give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. What ,in your opinion, should be the main function of a university?
It is argued that universities should provide graduates with the knowledge and skills needed in the workplace. Although, some people think that the true feature of universities should be to give access to knowledge for its own sake, regardless of whether the course is useful to an employer. I completely agree with the first statement, because these skills will help graduates in their jobs.
5
band
The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?
The assertion that average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in future that is now a considerable topic of discussion. I agree with the statement to an extent as there are several negative factors that could impact the public health.
5.5
band
Your friend just had a baby. You decided to prepare a present for them. Write a letter and say : 1. Congratulate your friend 2. Ask when would be possible for you to visit 3. Ask what present they would like.
Congratulations babe! I can't believe you have become a mom now. I would say time just flies in a blink of an eye. It seems like we are becoming so old now. I remember how much you like to spend time with kids when we were in school. I am sure you must enjoy your motherhood. I am so happy for you my sweetheart.
6.5
band
You arranged to visit a friend in Australia, but an important event at home now means that you must change the dates of the visit. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter, explain the important event apologise for the situation suggest a new arrangement Write at least 150 words.
I writing this letter to inform you that, I am not coming on the scheduled date to visit you due to a vital function in my family, but instead of it, I will come in the first week of the next month.
5.5
band
Some people believe that it is important for parents to tell or read stories for their children. Others think that parents don't have to do this because there are many sources for children to read like books, TV and movies. Discuss both views and give your opinion.
Some people argued that there is no need for parents to read stories since children can help themselves with reading and watching videos. While I understand that there are difficulties for busy fathers and mothers, I believe storytelling is a great measure to help offspring's development.

Your opinion

The average standard of people's health is likely to be lower in the future than it is now. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Your friend just had a baby. You decided to prepare a present for them. Write a letter and say : 1. Congratulate your friend 2. Ask when would be possible for you to visit 3. Ask what present they would like.

You arranged to visit a friend in Australia, but an important event at home now means that you must change the dates of the visit. Write a letter to your friend. In your letter, explain the important event apologise for the situation suggest a new arrangement Write at least 150 words.

Some people believe that it is important for parents to tell or read stories for their children. Others think that parents don't have to do this because there are many sources for children to read like books, TV and movies. Discuss both views and give your opinion.